1. Cleaning

Mom, I am so sorry I never realized how much cleaning you did around the house without me ever stepping up to help. Living with four roommates I now realize when you asked me to do the dishes you meant that day and not within that week. I have officially experienced scrubbing mold off of a tupperware container that sat in the sink longer than I can remember.

I see now that when you asked me to dust the mantle it was in dire need of it and wasn't simply a task to keep me busy. I have officially experienced the horrible coughing fit that comes about when a breeze blows through the house to lift the dust off the furniture. I see now that when you stopped midway out the door to clean that one spot off the kitchen floor, it was because a mess left would only turn into something worse.

I have officially experienced loosing a sock off my already cold feet from stepping in day old syrup that someone neglected to clean up. I no longer take for granted the hours you spent to keep a spotless house (or at least that is what I considered our house now that I have lived in my own house with roommates).

2. Backtracking to the house.

Mom, I am so sorry for all those times I forgot something at the house and had to have you run back to get it. Whether it was a car charger needed for the long trip ahead or an ankle brace needed for dance practice, I never really understood your frustration. However, now I do.

As a college student who very often forgets her ID for dinner back at the house, I now see how annoying it was to back track for something so simple. I kick myself in the butt every time I forget something that could have been so easily avoided if I had started getting ready to go just five minutes earlier. Now that I am older and living somewhere different than you, I can no longer expect you to be there when I foolishly mismanage my time. I thank you for all the times you kept your cool when I asked to go back to the house for something when you could have so easily made me go without it.

3. Taking care of the pets.

Mom, I am so sorry I begged for years to get a dog. As a 12 year old I thought it seemed like a great idea at the time and there wasn't a single possible draw back. I was wrong. Sure, I saw the times when Taz was younger and he peed in the house. However, I didn't have to clean it up. Sure, I knew the backyard was filled with unpleasant piles of nastiness. But again, I didn't have to clean it up. And sure, I heard the barking coming from the bathroom every time Taz needed a bath but absolutely hated the process. But then again, I wasn't the one who had to give it to him. And of course, I never considered how much money was spent each year on medicine or shots and the wallets that were wiped clean from buying dog food every month.

Now, as I have begun to pitch in for my roommate's dog when she is busy I realize how much work it is to own a pet. It is like I have my own child! There are constant messes made and attention that has to be given when I have my own work to do. In the end a dog is one of the most loyal companions one can ever have, but the work that has to be put in is far more than I ever imagined. I now understand why the answer was no for so long before we got Taz.

4. Paying the bills.

Mom, I am so sorry for all the times I asked for an extra $5 to go spend on ice cream. I see now that I milked every penny I could out of you and never felt bad about it. Let me just tell you now, that has changed. Living in a house now, I am the one who sees all the bills that come in. Living on my own, I am the one who pays for that new dress I so desperately need (but not really). Living in a college town, I am the one who gets asked to go out and splurge on ice cream. However, this time around I am the one paying for it myself.

Of all the times I asked to go to the movies with my friends, to order pizza on Saturday night or even to borrow a dollar just to see if I could win a stuffed animal I never realized what I was doing. Of course, I was not a child who lacked for much, but looking back I should have been more grateful. Now, I live paycheck to paycheck calculating if I have an extra couple of dollars to buy a beer at the bar. And now, I want to tell you that I appreciate all those times that you opened your wallet for me when you definitely didn't have to.

5. Worrying at night.

Now this one is a little more gushy, but I felt the need to say it anyway. I am sorry for all the nights I kept you up worrying. I was never (or so I thought) a bad kid. However, I had my fair share of coming in five minutes past curfew to find you still sitting awake on the couch waiting for me. Looking back, I thought it was silly that you didn't just go to bed before I got home and didn't worry so much about where I was. I thought it was silly that when I left one place in the evening I needed to tell you where I was headed next. And I thought it was silly when you told me that one day when I had my own kids I would understand.

Well, to be honest, I don't even have my own kids yet and I still think I have some what of an understanding of what you went through. I worry for my roommates on Friday nights when they are only a block or two away from the house. I worry about my friends who leave my house rather late to head back across campus. And believe it or not, I worry about you after a day spent here visiting me and then heading back home far later in the evening than planned. I now have a better understanding of not only why you would't go to sleep without me home, but why you simply couldn't go to sleep even if you tried.

Mom, for the 18 years that I lived at home and for the summers I still spend there, I want to say that I truly appreciate everything you have done. This is only a short list of things I have recently learned while living on my own. I can never cover all the things I have to be thankful for, but I pray that in your heart you know that I don't ever want to take you for granted again. You, as a parent and bestfriend, have taught me more than I ever realized and for that I thank you. You are superwoman to me and I love you more than you can imagine.

With lots of love,

Your daughter