Summer vacation holds the promise of long days near a beautiful body of water, be it an ocean, a lake, a river, or a pool. While taking a dip provides much-needed relief from the heat, for many, the true bliss lies in soaking up the sun on shore, perhaps while taking a snooze, chatting with friends, admiring newly purchased swimwear, or all of the above. Of course, the end goal of a day like this is to drive home with brand new tan lines and a fresh bronze gleam that epitomizes summertime.

These days are anticipated and cherished because there is no need for a single care in the world -- the defining characteristic of summer.

For most, this all holds true. For myself and all people who are exceptionally pale, these supposed "joyful" summer days are chock full of struggles. To be clear, I am not referring to Caucasian people who can only withstand getting a slight tan. I am talking about people who do not leave the house without a bottle of SPF 100 even in the dead of winter. You may not understand this unfortunate dilemma because you have never experienced getting sunburned after sun exposure for a mere 10 minutes.

But slapping on a layer of sunscreen should do the trick, right?

Absolutely not. So, I am here to explain to those blessed with sufficient melanin in your skin how we, your snow-white friends, wage war against the sun during the summer months.

Sunscreen is a full-time occupation.

You may think it is perfectly alright to apply a single layer of sunscreen and call it a day, or even worse, plunge immediately into water post-application. This very dangerous thinking indeed, and for the woefully white population, it is a recipe for disaster. The acronym SPF stands for Sun Protection Factor. If you wear SPF 15, you are only protected 15 times the amount it takes your skin to burn, which in actuality is just about 15 minutes. So, naturally, this calls for vigilant round-the-clock application regardless of the fun you are having. Furthermore, application of sunscreen must occur at the very least 20 minutes before any water activity, and you had best be wearing a water-resistant formula! While you may regard these guidelines more like suggestions, I legitimately live and breathe these rules as if they were Holy Scripture. One slip-up, and you can forget any prospect of coming home without resembling a ripe tomato.

Wearing a swim-shirt is a must.

Bought a brand new swimsuit for summer? Can’t wait to show it off? Well, unfortunately, if your skin tone can be likened to a sheet of paper, the top of your swim suit may never see the light of day. I am going to be honest... The burden of constant sunscreen application can really start to take a toll. Although swim shirts may seemingly be sported exclusively by children 11 years old and below, I have no shame in admitting that I do, in fact, own a swim shirt in not only an adult size, but a lovely turquoise color. No, I do not need or use it for surfing, just my sanity.

Ball caps simply do not cut it.

This is pretty self-explanatory, and goes along with the theme that in most situations, fashion must be sacrificed to avoid peril (aka sunburn). Wear a ball cap, and the neck is completely exposed! I do not know if you have ever tried to sleep with a sunburn on the neck, but let me tell you, it is painful. Look into investing in a stylish and effective full-brim hat.

Pictured: My brother, myself, and my mother on vacation in Mexico. As you can see, I was not kidding about the swim-shirts or sunhats.

There is no such thing as an impromptu beach excursion.

What fun, a spontaneous trip to the beach! More like: What fun, a spontaneous third-degree sunburn and many subsequent days of pain and agony!

There is nowhere off limits for a sunburn.

A traditional sunburn may occur on an arm or leg, maybe even on the stomach or back if you are careless. I am sure even some of you tan people have been there. Have you, however, gotten a sunburn in between your fingers? In your armpit? On the palms of your hands? Personally, I answer yes to all of the above. No body part is exempt to the vicious UV rays.

I hope this was both illuminating and entertaining. Also, even if you do not burn easily or at all, it is very important to wear sunscreen! Take care of your skin.