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11 Signs You Attend A Private Christian University

One of my Bible Professors told me that the Christian version of "hooking up" was just a "NCMO."

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11 Signs You Attend A Private Christian University
biola.edu

Those who attend private Christian Universities have certain commonalities. Most people think we’re repressed and have weird rules or social norms, but we all know that those oddities make our college experience that much better. Drinking and doing drugs is against our contract, but we’ve never attended an All-Hall or campus event where we didn’t feel high…on the Holy Spirit.

1. Chapel credits are as good as cold, hard cash.

Going to chapel. This is probably one of the best spiritual investments and most difficult mandatory events to roll out of bed to attend. You always try to get just enough credits required, just don’t be like those people in the back who are always Facebook.

2. Professors often stop class to make everyone sing a hymn.

Similar to chapel, this can go either of two ways; it can be extremely beautiful to corporately worship in the middle of your average Biology G.E., or it can be extremely awkward. It’s difficult to rate how spiritual and emotional you want to get while learning about phylums.

3. You bring your Bible EVERYWHERE

While it’s good to have the Word handy at all times—I mean, it should be written on your heart, but sometimes it’s difficult to memorize Leviticus—if you don’t bring it to class, chapel, or coffee with a friend, you will feel like a bad Christian. Just stick a small Bible in your pocket, and keep one in your backpack at all times, it’ll improve your life.

4. You use the hashtag #PTL (#PraiseTheLord) way too much.

5. “Ring by spring” is a thing.

If you go to a Christian University and don’t get a ring by spring, you’re obviously doing something wrong. Make that GYRAD last a lifetime.

6. You live by the contract.

We have to sign a contract that we won’t drink, do drugs, or be promiscuous. Many non-Christian colleges encourage these activities, but at a private Christian University, our faculty encourages moral living. This does nothing but enhance our college experience, as we can be sober minded.

7. Meeting for coffee is your go-to.

We always meet for coffee at one of our campus coffee shops. Even if the iced coffee tastes like manure, we will purchase the overly expensive cup of joe.

8. Spontaneous worship sessions are a regular occurrence.

If we’re feeling spiritually dry and in need of worship, we’ll just break out our acoustic guitars and cajones and sing about the redemptive love of Jesus.

9. You know literally everyone.

Our student body population is less than 5,000, we literally know everyone.

10. You've had siblings attend before you or have siblings attending after you.

If you have a sibling on campus, everyone will make references to you when seen together. And everyone will ask if you’re twins.

11. You pray before your exams.

It's pretty cliche, but yeah, we pray before our exams. It can't hurt, right?

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