As an aspiring cat lady of sorts, I thought it time to spread the joy of cats to the world. I always hear about someone's new baby and how cute it is but have you ever seen a cat? Or kitten? Zero competition. It’s well known that cats rule and kids drool (like literally all the time…eww) but people need an extra push to open their heart to cats which are the clearly superior mammals. I mean if ancient Egyptians worshipped them then there has to be something people are missing. So here are a few reasons why felines are better than humans.
1. Cuteness
Cats in general are beautiful creatures sent from the heavens. Children? Not so much. When looking at any video, picture, or even just imagining a cute kitty I am ready to black out from happiness (and hyperventilation). Have you ever seen a kitten’s toe beans? No? Then shut your face. Don’t get me wrong there are some ugly cats out there but I’ve seen more ugly babies by far.P.S. stop posting your ugly children—you know it’s ugly, I know it's ugly and I will talk about it.
2. Independence
*Irreplaceable by Beyonce plays in the background*
One of the best things about cats is their independence. They don’t need the walking changing at 3 a.m. or the annoying amounts of attention children need. As long as they are fed, watered and have a clean litter box they are in good condition. Cats will find their own entertainment—trust me. Children require hours of attention and cleaning and ugh. Just no.
3. Predators
If I have a mouse in my house is my kid going to kill it? No they aren’t, because they’re probably contracting a disease by playing with it. Cats will do what is needed to keep their home happy. Babies on the other hand grow into killing machines and don’t know when to stop. All I’m saying is I’m more likely to be killed by my own offspring than my cwute, fwuffy fwand.
4. Purring
I don’t know how to explain it but when a kitten or cat purrs you feel so proud of yourself. You just made one of your best friends so happy their whole body is vibrating. On top of that purring has health benefits. It can help strengthen bones, heal infection, lower blood pressure and more. On the other hand children cry, scream, yell, etc., and they offer zero health benefits.
5. Understanding
Cats are understanding, kind, wise animals. They come cuddle when you are stressed out, follow you around when you feel lonely, watch TV with you when you’re bored, etc. Infants don’t understand that you haven’t slept in 12 hours or even care to understand for matter. Children don’t care that you just want to go to the bathroom by yourself and no you don’t have games on your phone. Teenagers don’t understand how much you sacrificed to have them living today. Adults don’t care because they’re trying to live their own lives. Cats always care and cats are always there.
In conclusion, cats are the best thing humans have ever had the privilege interacting with. They give you everything you want and need and for all intents and purposes they treat you like the big, dumb, hairless kitten you essentially are. They love you almost unconditionally and make sure you know they're there for good or bad.
On a more serious note, if you are able to adopt a cat (or two) and give it a forever home please do. Cats are under appreciated animals and are euthanized more than any other pet, mostly due to the fact that they are less likely to enter a shelter with owner identification. If you are able to save the life of this majestic creature why not?