As many pet owners know, having a cat is quite the commitment. Such a commitment that it might just resemble your relationship with your girlfriend. Let's look at the reasons why:
1. You find hair everywhere.
Your cat sheds her hair all over your apartment. However, your girlfriend tends to have the same effect when she comes to visit. Regardless of how often you vacuum, you manage to somehow always find hair that isn't yours in the bathroom, on the couch, on your clothes, and literally anywhere the eye can see.
2. She expects food precisely to her liking.
Just how your cat may turn up their nose if you dare to put dry food in their bowl, your girlfriend may be upset if your romantic dinner consists of leftover KFC. And just like your cat, your girlfriend will probably be upset if she is hungry and there is no food around. Your cat will simply sing the song of its people until its bowl is filled, but your girlfriend will look at you with her big eyes and whimper, "I want Taco Bell."
3. You will find sleeping with your cat or girlfriend to provide interesting challenges.
Your cat loves to sleep with you, but its favorite places are your face, your pillow, or your keyboard when you're typing. Now having sleepovers with your girlfriend can lead to dead arm, lack of bed space, and overall mobility. Much like how cats meow and sing in the middle of the night, your girlfriend may start talking about alien pickles and fires in the mustard jar during the night.
4. Be careful how you show affection towards them.
Your cat likes precisely two belly rubs from the front to back. If you rub them a third time, they will hiss and bite. Now your girlfriend likes to be held and cuddled, only when they like it, precisely in the position they like it, regardless of how comfortable it is for you. Also, there's a good chance that if you make your girlfriend be the big spoon or mention the word "anal" in any context, you may be met with a disapproving look or slight grumble.
5. Your girlfriend and your cat react similarly when you come home from work.
I see you have returned. Feed and cuddle me now. Tell me I'm pretty.
As difficult as your cat or girlfriend might be, you honestly do not know what you would do without them. Even though they may seem indifferent to your existence sometimes, you know that they love you - I mean as long as there is food around.
