Teenagehood—a time of growth and learning, a time of self-discovery, a time to mess around, make mistakes and have fun. While often portrayed as the highlight of your entire life, teenagehood has its cons; social and academic pressure, past regrets and the consequences of impulsive decisions, and the general struggle of finding yourself all make teenage years a challenging period in anyone's life. As a teenager myself, here are several things I have discovered about teenagehood and teenagers as a whole.
1. Teenagers are impulsive.
It's a stereotype, sure, and one that I'm sure many teenagers would be keen to discard. But it's absolutely true. Every teenager, myself included, acts impulsively at least once during their adolescence, and oftentimes these impulsive decisions are downright reckless, whether it be going to a party in full awareness of the presence of drugs and alcohol, sneaking out to meet with friends late at night or even just an in-the-moment decision to cross your boundaries with someone of the preferred gender. For the longest time I dismissed this stereotype, even resented it, feeling that it unfairly represented teenagers. But as I enter into my senior year, I'm looking back and realizing all the times I acted impulsively throughout high school. Sometimes stereotypes are more accurate than we like to admit.
2. Teenagers are self-centered.
Again, another stereotype I always brushed aside; in fact, I actively despised adults who bought into what I believe was a complete misrepresentation of teenagers. However, mostly by reflecting on my own actions, I've come to realize, again, the truth in this stereotype. While teenagers may not always be actively selfish—as in, intentionally putting themselves and their own needs in front of others—it is true that we as a whole are self-centered. Social media, with its emphasis on self-image, exemplifies this notion, as we are completely focused on making sure we look pretty and popular. It's inherently self-absorbed, and I am completely guilty of this sin of teenagehood. But I also believe this trademark self-centeredness is an essential part of growing up—we need to learn about ourselves and our own insecurities and limitations before we can reach out and help others.
3. Teenagehood is not always the highlight of your life.
Being a teenager is a relatively carefree time in life—a time before the stress of paying bills, going to work and raising a family. But that doesn't mean it's the highlight of your entire life. For me, my high school years have been a time of emotional turmoil and drama. There have definitely been highlights, but I hope it's not the highlight of my entire life. While I haven't yet had to deal with adult responsibility, teenage stresses, and insecurities—both my own and those of the people around me—are downright miserable, and I'm looking forward to a day when I can truthfully say I've outgrown them.
4. Teenagers do have real problems.
I feel like it goes to two extremes on this issue—people either think that teenagers need to get over themselves, or they think that teenagers are "tragic heroes" fighting against a cruel world. While I don't think teenager problems are all that serious in most cases, the real issue isn't the problems themselves but the insecurities and stress attached to them. I'll be the first to say that many of my problems aren't all that serious if I look at them in relation to what other kids my age have to deal with around the world, but it's my own insecurities and lack of perspective that make small problems seem tantamount to the apocalypse. Looking back, it's easy for adults to roll their eyes at how much value they placed at other people's opinions, but as a teenager, it can be pretty lonely to be unpopular or deal with bullying or gossip. Not to mention that many teenagers do have to deal with abuse, depression and other mental disorders, dysfunctional family lives, poverty and any number of other objectively "real" problems. Not all teenagers are drama queens, but trying to navigate the drama of high school is enough to stress anyone out. Which leads into my next point.
5. Adults underestimate how stressed we are.
Again, teenagers don't face bills, family lives or work, but school is pretty stressful. It's hard to balance academics, social lives, part-time jobs, family obligations and extracurriculars all at once. While adults have full schedules too, as teenagers we are unsure of ourselves; our esteem is easily torn down, and we are generally not confident enough in our strengths and abilities. As a result, everything stresses us out way more than it should. Throw in college visits and the application process, and it's no wonder so many teenagers are depressed and anxious.
As I enter into my last year of high school, I've been spending more time reflecting on the past three years. While I can't wait for college, I know that I will miss the lack of responsibility that comes with high school. Being a teenager isn't easy, but your high school experiences are what shape you as a person. I would never want to relive the past three years, but I also have no regrets. Without everything I have been through, good and bad, I wouldn't be the person I am today. And that, I believe, is the essence of teenagehood.
