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40 Reasons Jean-Ralphio Is Actually The Best

You must sing the title of this article.

Sophia Pajewski

Jul 19, 2016

Cardinal Stritch University

964

40 Reasons Jean-Ralphio Is Actually The Best

SlashFilm

To anyone that knows me, it is no secret that I could watch "Parks and Recreation" on repeat for the rest of my life and be perfectly happy. Just one of the many things that are so great about this show is Jean-Ralphio, who is... Honestly, I have no clue how to describe Jean-Ralphio. But, to justify why I adore him so, I have compiled this list of reasons that Jean-Ralphio is more than just the cocky, impulsive, excitable, idealistic man most of his acquaintances seem to think he is. Here are 40 reasons I really and truly believe Jean-Ralphio Saperstein to be the best.

1. He. Loves. Everybody.

There isn't a single person that Jean-Ralphio is not happy to see and be around.

2. He sees pregnant women for the beautiful goddesses they are.

3. He’s totally secure in his sexuality. And I repeat, he loves everybody.

Everybody. Because everyone is beautiful and everyone deserves to know that someone out there thinks so. Jean-Ralphio is basically the poster child for universal love.

4. He especially loves his BFF, Tom Haverford.

5. He will always make sure his friends are taken care of.

My best friend has never offered me anything like this. What I wouldn't give to have someone who looked out for me this way.

6. And can’t stand to see his Tommy sad.

How sweet is that?!

7. He’s super supportive of Tom, too.

8. And is always ready to offer inspiration.

9. But is by no means too good to grow and learn from the people he trusts.

10. He is not afraid to let Tom know how important he is to him.

11. And though he will never pressure you into anything...

12. ...He can be counted on to provide a push when it’s called for.

13. Family is also super important to Jean-Ralphio.

14. So much that he didn’t want to move too far from home when he reached adulthood.

And those matching pajamas? I'm not over it.

15. He probably learned it from his dad.

16. He’s always making new friends, and he’s super flexible.

Craig usually freaks people out with his intensity, but if anyone can handle it, it's Jean-Ralphio with his youthful sense of adventure and full heart.

17. He wants everyone to be able to see their full potential, and he’s totally ready to help.

18. He knows how to make people feel special.

Can you imagine being greeted like this? Can you imagine knowing someone always so excited to see you as this?

19. He is so accommodating.

20. He believes in honesty.

21. And is surprisingly self-aware.

22. He can always find a silver lining.

23. Like anyone else, he has no trouble finding pleasure in the simple things in life.

I did mention his youthful sense of adventure, right?

24. He doesn’t condone substance abuse, but he’s certainly not too big a person to profit off of the stupidity of others.

25. He’s always trying something new, but knows when an idea is really no good, and doesn’t let rejection hurt his feelings.

And he takes romantic rejection just as well. More guys like this would make the whole world better.

26. He’ll just keep finding fun, new ways to make money.

27. And coming up with the craziest ways to entertain people.

28. Because, really, all he really wants is to have fun...

29. And to make sure others, do, too.

30. Did I mention his superior geography knowledge?

I had never even heard of Tajikistan before Jean-Ralphio. Now, I not only know where Tajikistan is, but where Uzbekistan and Kyrgyzstan are, too. And that they exist.

31. And his truly beautiful mastery of the English language?

As an English and writing major, I can confirm that this is up there with most of the literature I've studied. We might as well put this in the literary canon.

32. Honestly, this man is a poet.

33. Even the government understands how important it is that we keep this wonderful man close.

So hot.

34. Seriously, there is just SO MUCH LOVE in his heart.

35. Plus, this is honestly the best anyone has ever looked in denim since JT and Britney in 2001.

36. Also, he sings literally ALL THE TIME.

Of course, when I do it, it's "obnoxious" and "grating."

37. And look at these dance moves.

38. Are you looking at them?

39. These are the dance moves of a superior human being.

40. In conclusion:

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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40 Reasons Jean-Ralphio Is Actually The Best

You must sing the title of this article.

1. He. Loves. Everybody.

2. He sees pregnant women for the beautiful goddesses they are.

3. He’s totally secure in his sexuality. And I repeat, he loves everybody.

4. He especially loves his BFF, Tom Haverford.

5. He will always make sure his friends are taken care of.

6. And can’t stand to see his Tommy sad.

7. He’s super supportive of Tom, too.

8. And is always ready to offer inspiration.

9. But is by no means too good to grow and learn from the people he trusts.

10. He is not afraid to let Tom know how important he is to him.

11. And though he will never pressure you into anything...

12. ...He can be counted on to provide a push when it’s called for.

13. Family is also super important to Jean-Ralphio.

14. So much that he didn’t want to move too far from home when he reached adulthood.

15. He probably learned it from his dad.

16. He’s always making new friends, and he’s super flexible.

17. He wants everyone to be able to see their full potential, and he’s totally ready to help.

18. He knows how to make people feel special.

19. He is so accommodating.

20. He believes in honesty.

21. And is surprisingly self-aware.

22. He can always find a silver lining.

23. Like anyone else, he has no trouble finding pleasure in the simple things in life.

24. He doesn’t condone substance abuse, but he’s certainly not too big a person to profit off of the stupidity of others.

25. He’s always trying something new, but knows when an idea is really no good, and doesn’t let rejection hurt his feelings.

26. He’ll just keep finding fun, new ways to make money.

27. And coming up with the craziest ways to entertain people.

28. Because, really, all he really wants is to have fun...

29. And to make sure others, do, too.

30. Did I mention his superior geography knowledge?

31. And his truly beautiful mastery of the English language?

32. Honestly, this man is a poet.

33. Even the government understands how important it is that we keep this wonderful man close.

34. Seriously, there is just SO MUCH LOVE in his heart.

35. Plus, this is honestly the best anyone has ever looked in denim since JT and Britney in 2001.

36. Also, he sings literally ALL THE TIME.

37. And look at these dance moves.

38. Are you looking at them?

39. These are the dance moves of a superior human being.

40. In conclusion:

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The struggles of having an RBF are all too real

1. People asking if you're mad at them.

2. Those people who hand out flyers don't always try to stop you.

3. Creepy guys telling you to smile.

4. "I thought you were a bitch when I first met you."

5. People telling you you'd be "so much prettier if you smiled."

6. Doing your makeup and looking great, which somehow intensifies the bitch face.

7. Regularly explaining "it's just my face."

We all go through certain stages when we have a crush, Tina just explains it better.

That moment that someone you never looked twice at suddenly makes you do a double take out of no where.

But you can't have a crush, that's outrageous. It's all in your head.

Because you don't have a crush, there's no reason to tell anyone about anything. Right?

But then they do something irresistible and you start to lose it.

Now accepting the fact you have a crush, you have to keep it under control.

Then there's the part where you tell your friends who will claim they called it.

They'll be excited and cheer you on. That's until they realize that your crush is all you'll be talking about.

Your obsession has become so bad, that your Facebook stalking is getting out of control.

But your friends will try and help move things along any way they can. That doesn't mean it will be any helpful though.

As time goes on, you start having fantasies about the two of you and it's starting to scare you a little.

You can't focus on anything because all your attention is on them and everything they do.

Anybody who comes near your crush is now an enemy, and you are willing to fight for your crush.

When you see them, you act like an idiot. Trying to hide your feelings may not be as discrete as you think.

Keeping your feelings inside will start to be harder and harder until you can't keep it inside anymore.

Who knows, maybe it will work out? Take a chance.

May the odds be ever in your favor.

What about those of us who don't do it all in four years?

1. You feel like an elder.

2. You may feel lonely.

3. Senioritis is more real than ever.

4. You may feel a little down sometimes.

5. Fear of missing out won't be as real.

6. You are a college pro.

7. You'll have more free time.

8. You're happy you're still in school.

9. You feel like a guru.

10. You continue to grow.

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