Lately, I've found that it's getting more and more difficult to love the "unlovable." Whether it's simply not being able to get along with someone, or absolutely despising said enemy, here are a few ways to show love to even the most difficult people in your life:
1. Pray for them.
Matthew 5:44, "But I say to you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you..."
Oftentimes, we get too caught up in the hate we feel for a certain person that we don't stop and look at them as a human being who is facing the heartbreaks and tribulations that life has to offer. We view them as a machine whose sole purpose is to make our lives hell. Pray for these people. Ask God to give you the eyes that He has, the eyes that see you as His perfect Son's image, despite all of your wrong doings against Him.
Ask God to give you the strength and patience to love this person, because we all know what it's like to try and love our enemies without His help. Impossible.
Ask God to save them, to save their soul. How much easier would it be to love those around us if we viewed them as lost souls desperately needing a savior?
Lastly, ask God to soften your enemy's heart, because you could be doing all the things to love them, yet still get treated the same as chopped liver. At the end of your life, don't you want to be able to say you fulfilled His command to "love thy neighbor as thyself" to the best of your ability?
2. Show them kindness.
Colossians 3:12, "Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience."
Now, there is a difference between doing kind things and BEING kind. Being a genuinely kind person towards one another requires you to love them and have a willingness to be selfless. Sacrifice one minute in the morning to send them an encouraging text, or sacrifice three dollars and grab a coffee for them. Even nice words can mean the world to an "enemy." Kindness really isn't all that hard, and I'd encourage you to demonstrate these small acts of kindness daily.
3. Get to know them.
Hebrews 10:24-25, "And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another..."
Honestly, this can be the hardest one. Taking time out of your day to get to know someone you don't necessarily like can be a daunting thought. Once you actually sit down and get to know your enemy, you will find it will get harder and harder to hate them. When you get the opportunity to hear about where someone has come from and what they've been through, it's extremely hard NOT to relate to them.
If you can't relate to them, then simply find something you like about them and cling onto that trait or personality quirk for dear life. It will be your saving grace in being able to love them.
Even if your personalities don't necessarily click, you will walk away knowing that there is SOMETHING in them that you can find to love.
4. Forgive them.
Mark 11:25, "And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you."
The most amazing way love was displayed to us was Christ loving us despite our constant sinning against Him. If we are called to be Christ-like, doesn't that mean we ought to do the same? Forgive others of their transgressions against us? YES, a million times yes. We don't deserve the forgiveness offered to us, so why should we withhold forgiveness from those who are equal to us?
Often times, forgiveness is looked at as weakness, but being able to forgive is one of the most amazing signs of strength. You have the ability to let go of the hurt that a particular person has caused, intentionally or unintentionally.
Yes, it's true, I have yet to master the ability to completely and genuinely love my enemy. But I find that when I focus on going out of my way to love the "unlovable," it helps shape me into the image of God that I so desperately desire.