At a recent family event, there was a heated discussion as to whether it is okay for girls to have platonic guy friends. Seems ridiculous, I know. Apparently, girls cannot have friends who are males without any feelings of wanting to be in a relationship with that person to go along with this presumed friendship. However, one of my family members has a specific theory (for which he felt very strongly about) as to the specific categories of guy friends that a girl could have.
1. The guy friends that were once boyfriends
Some people are capable of remaining civil after a failed relationship. These people probably know you better than anyone else so it is beneficial to keep them around. Is this an accurate statement? I am sure that there are many girls out there whose best guy friends were past boyfriends. Is this an accurate statement with regards to my friendships? No...so far, cousin John is not that far off with his male friendship theory.
2. The guy friends that you used to hook-up with
This is a claim that could go either way. Personally, I have plenty of male friends whom I have never hooked up with and never will hook up with. They are more like brothers to me but I do understand that people can hook up with guy friends especially if you are all hanging out and alcohol is involved in the mix of this. Again, this theory is not too far off.
3. The guy friends who were never past boyfriends/hook-up buddies that you think are totally platonic friends but they secretly like you
This was a ridiculous claim and I immediately argued it. John then stopped me and said, "if you showed the slightest bit of romantic interest in one of your so-called guy friends, would he be interested?" I sat and thought about it for a few seconds and honestly some of them would probably be down...but not all of ones that fit into this arbitrary category. The theory is slowly deteriorating.
4. The guy friends that would never be romantically involved with you due to their sexual orientation
So basically, according to John's theory, the only guy friends a girl could have that would never have romantic feelings towards you are if they are not heterosexual. I feel that this is not true at all considering girls can have plenty of heterosexual male friends that have zero romantic interest in them.
Ultimately, the basis of John's Theory of Male Friendship is that your guy friends will always have romantic feelings towards you unless they are not interested in females. I do not agree entirely with it considering I have some pals that don't fit any of these categories but I guess that is what makes it a theory!