If you haven’t noticed by now, I love telling people that I’m a Libertarian. I love it when they ask me what a Libertarian is. I love it when I tell them about the wondrous world of Johnson-Weld 2016, and I love when I see their eyes light up when they realize that yes, there is another choice. I love when I can say those four special words: “socially liberal; fiscally conservative.” I love it when people compare me to Ron Swanson.

But most of all, I love it when people tell me absolute bull$h!t. I love it when they spout their fear-mongered lies about why Libertarians will be the downfall of this nation, and we’re baby killers, and we hate the poor, and our ideas will never work. I love relishing in how oh so wrong they are.

So in case anyone is confused…no wait. Someone is definitely confused. Let me revise…

In case you have accidentally uncovered a belligerent, poorly-read voter here are some points that you can shout back to them. They may not listen, but hey, as a Libertarian we have to believe in their freedom to choose to have a closed mind.

1. Libertarians don’t want you to think they’re conservatives, or liberals, or authoritarians, or even anarchists.

If we look up “what is a libertarian” on the trusty Google (not Bing, never Bing, Bing is not trusty) we can see that the definition is “a person who believes in the doctrine of free will.” It is just that. We aren’t planning the utter downfall of government, we aren’t looking to raise taxes (looking at you, conservatives and liberals) and we’re definitely not looking for maximum control.

2. Libertarians don’t want to kill babies.

This topic is so hot button, I almost don’t want to write about it. But, unfortunately, this is an argument that people just love to throw in my face, and I’m sure I’m not the only Libertarian who has gotten disgusted looks and called rude names. Libertarians aren’t for abortion; they’re for the government staying the hell out of it. You don’t want your tax dollars to fund Planned Parenthood? Libertarians don’t really want your tax dollars to fund it either. You don’t want to outlaw abortion?Libertarians don’t really want to outlaw it either. The fact is, it is not up to you to make someone pay to fund a program they don’t support. It is also not up to you to decide what other people are allowed to do with their bodies. And above all of that, it is most definitely not up to the government. Yell at me, tell my mom, call me names-- I don’t care. It’s a personal decision. End of story.

3. Libertarians aren’t potheads.

Yes, some potheads are Libertarian but the two aren’t mutually exclusive. Truthfully, alcohol is way more dangerous than pot. Tobacco is way more dangerous than pot. And aside from that, it is absolutely atrocious that there are people in prison for (sometimes) decades because they were growing marijuana and BrockTurner is walking around happy as a lark. Screw that guy. And screw overcrowding prisons. That fact alone should make every single American ashamed of their justice system (even though we have a plethora of shameful justice to choose from).

4. Libertarians don’t want you to write them off as losers.

I know, right? “Join the club,” I’d say sarcastically to myself, if I had just read that in an article. But bear with me. This is the fun thing about the atrocity that is the 2016 campaign season…this election is what made me a Libertarian. Whaaaaat? Yes. I have not been a lifelong Libertarian. Well, that isn’t true. I’ve always believed these things; I just never knew that I could be represented. My friend introduced me to the Johnson-Weld platform a little over a year ago. Since then, I’ve gotten more and more interested in politics. I’ve been reading, I’ve been appalled by the two-party system, and I’ve been dying for a change. This election made me want to grow up and become a Libertarian campaign manager. This election made me want to write about politics. This election made me realize that other people want answers, other people want options, and I can be the voice in someone else’s life that introduces them to Libertarianism. And if enough people say, “yes, I will vote with my conscience,” things could take a turn for the better.

To close, I’d like to ride along that last point a little more. If you are planning to vote

Libertarian, or you’ve thought to yourself “I want to vote Libertarian, but I am so afraid my vote won’t count,” you need to watch this video.

http://balancedrebellion.com/

And so I leave you, dearest readers, and I thank you for waiting around to see if I’d start ranting about politics again. I’ll be back next week, and in the meantime, feel free to catch up on any of my other articles. They’re old but still good.