When you're a kid the last thing on your mind is saying goodbye to your parents. We think we have all the time in the world, we don't always say everything in our hearts because we don't realize how soon life will end for them. It's been 10 years and I can still feel the ache of the absence of my mama and there's so much I wish I would've had the time to say.
I am proud to be your daughter
I know life wasn't always easy for you but you gave me the best life you could for my first 8 years and I loved you for it. You always reminded me how strong I was and how much you loved me. You were one of the most hard-working people I've ever known, you didn't have the greatest jobs but you worked hard, put in overtime and anything you could to make life easier for me and Matthew. People still stop me and tell me how much I look like you and how proud of me you would be. You are my inspiration to work hard for things I want in life, and I couldn't be more thankful that you were my mama.
I miss you and love you
I miss you and love you more than anything in this world. Somedays I just wish I could pick up the phone and call you and tell you about my day. When big things happen you're the first person I want to tell but I know I can't and my heart breaks a little bit. You will always hold a very special place in my heart. The memories and pictures I have are things I will cherish forever.
I'll save you a seat
Words can't describe how I felt at my high school graduation and not seeing you there smiling; it was a day I was proud of and I knew you would be too. Words can't describe how I feel that you won't be able to meet some of my best friends because I know you'd love them all as much as I do. Words can't describe how I feel knowing you won't be at my college graduation. You'd be so so proud. Words can't describe how I feel that I won't see tears in your eyes at my wedding, or how you won't be around when I start a family. However, words can describe the love I feel knowing that through all these experiences and new chapters you are in my heart and I promise that even though you aren't here physically I promise I will save you a seat.
Thank you, thank you so much
Thank you for all the lessons you taught me. The lessons that you taught me while you were here with me on earth and the ones you've taught me since you had to leave. Thank you for holding me during the storms and letting me cry and calming my fears. Thank you for spoiling me but also showing me what hard work is and where it can get me. Thank you for always being my number 1 fan through dance recitals and gymnastics and plays and ceremonies at school; you were always there. Finally, thank you for all the memories that I have left to cherish for the rest of my life.