The past few months I have found myself struggling spiritually, mentally, and physically with all the chaos that seems to be going on around me. Trying to manage school, family, my social life, mental health, and other responsibilities have me barely keeping my head above water. However, in the midst of this chaos, it taught me how to swim. It can be really easy to get down on yourself, but these little reminders are what helped keep me going.
1) It’s Okay To Take Breaks
Life is really hard. A lot of the time it moves faster than I can. The world is overwhelming, impatient, and it doesn't slow down or stop just because I need it to. The truth is, it's this way for everyone.
But there are moments. Moments filled with stillness and inexplicable peace that is enough to keep you going. They can look like coffee breaks, walking your dog, reading your favorite book, or they can even be the two minutes of quiet during a bathroom break. For me, these moments come in the form of writing, laying in bed listening to the same song over and over again, or watching a TV show that I have seen a thousand times.
Breaks can be anything and they can happen anywhere, even in the midst of chaos. They are important, and you are not lazy for capitalizing on them. I encourage you to spend time with yourself, listening to what your body and mind are telling you.
“Then, because so many people were coming and going that they did not even have a chance to eat, he said to them, ‘Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest.’ So they went away by themselves in a boat to a solitary place.” Mark 6:31-32
2) There Are People Who Care
Naturally, I am a very guarded person, so when I am feeling low it is easy for me to isolate myself from the people I love. If you are anything like me, then destructive thoughts such as “no one cares” and “ no one will ever understand this” creep in and they wreak havoc. If you get anything out of this post, let it be this: These thoughts are lies.
Recently, I was reading an article on anxiety and it was talking about combating intrusive thoughts with positive statements. At first, I thought it was gonna be another one of those “drink some more water” or “happy thoughts only!” kinds of posts, but that idea really had me thinking. The only way to disprove lies is to confront them with the truth. Instead of obsessing over the destructive lies, speak what is true:
“There are people in my life who care, and their names are…”
“There are people in my life who care, and even if they don't understand what I am experiencing, they will try.”
“They will listen.”
“They will love me through it.”
To those people, thank you. Thank you, for being the reminder.
“ When Job’s three friends, Eliphaz the Temanite, Bildad the Shuhite and Zophar the Naamanthite, heard about all the troubles that had come upon him, they set out from their homes and met together by agreement to go and sympathize with him and comfort him.” Job 2:11
3) Your Grades Do Not Define You
Let's be real for a second: college is hard. Like, really hard. In high school, I was a straight-A student while also playing on three different soccer teams and that wasn't nearly as difficult as college. There is a lot more work, expectation, and pressure to succeed than there ever was in high school.
There will always be that person who says, “I did so bad on that biology exam. I got a 92." You do not have to be that person. There is nothing wrong with wanting to do better or working harder, but at the end of the day, you are going to graduate and you are going to get that job. There is more to your story than just how well you did in school, and you are allowed to be proud of yourself for that.
You are worth so much more than any 4.0, and there is no numerical value that this world can place on you.
God values you so much that he offers us eternity through His son.
“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” John 3:16
4) If You Want To Say No, Say No
In one of my first posts, I mentioned that I had trouble saying what I actually mean, and that is still true--especially in times when I am struggling. I find myself slipping into ‘peer pressure’ and saying yes to things that I wouldn't ordinarily agree to. Most of the time it feels like I literally cannot say no. I am probably one of the most indecisive people you will ever meet and I value so much of what other people think of me, it's exhausting.
I put myself in situations that I could have avoided, had I just said what I actually wanted to say.
Here is the truth: If you say no, and people hate you for it, you are probably doing the right thing. If people hate you because you have opinions and values that you stick to, then you probably aren't hanging out with the right people.
Saying no is something you have complete control and authority to do. If you want to say no, say no.
“Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your mind on things above, not on earthly things.” Colossians 3:1-2