We, as a society, have a love-hate relationship with the word "fat." Using it as an insult, especially among women, is the lowest of the low. Yet we use it to describe ourselves when we're not feeling great. We turn to the side in the mirror and scrunch our faces up: "Ugh, I feel so fat". Then there are the bravest of us, the women who take the selfie and say, "Yeah? I'm fat".
Then, there's the in between. We're the skinny-fat . Not quite skinny, not quite fat. I've been on both ends of the spectrum, and there isn't anything that compares to skinny-fat
1. Our friends hate when we complain about our bodies.
"If you think you're fat, you must think I'm a cow". If I had a dollar for every time I heard this, my student loans would be looking pretty nice right now. How I view my body has nothing to do with the way I view yours. To some people, we look good. To others, maybe not so much, but the only opinion that counts is our own. We might voice that opinion from time to time but that doesn't mean we need reassurance - or scolded.
2. We're plus-sized in some brands and "regular" in others.
There's nothing quite like owning a pair of jeans in a size eight then turning around to find another pair that fit the same exact way, except in a size 14. It makes no sense. It makes me want to stop wearing pants forever (can I get an amen!). Our society is so focused on the number instead of the fit, shopping becomes a mind game.
3. Summer is our worst enemy.
To bikini or not to bikini? Skinny-fat people face this issue every summer. On one hand, everyone tells you that you can pull it off. You, on the other hand, feel that couldn't be farther from the truth. We don't know what to believe.
4. Catcalls are weird.
I know, I know. As women and definitely as feminists, we're supposed to denounce the catcall in all forms. It's gross and annoying. And it truly is. But sometimes, someone acknowledging that you look good especially if you don't think you do, isn't 100 percent weird. It's like I should be mad but sometimes I don't want to be.
The struggle of the skinny-fat person likely won't ever come to and end, because society likely won't ever stop telling us what we should look like. But the only thing we can do is decide for ourselves how seriously we want to take these struggles. If we want to wear the bikini and eat the cheese fries then complain about it later, then we will dammit! The best thing is having the freedom to bitch about it. Not to mention, we can change our minds any time we want. Like I said, the only opinion that counts, is our own.