Ahhhh, NYC trains. What magical places. The aroma, the sights, and the most important aspect of the NYC train life: the people. From the moment you take your seat to the minute you finally get to escape the depths of the train, you never really know who you’re going to come across. When you spend 4 hours of your day commuting to and from Manhattan, you become familiar with the different people you see on the trains (you never actually meet these people because you like to keep a safe distance, just in case they do something rogue.) SO, if you ever find yourself on a train into NYC, keep an eye out for the following types of people that you will most definitely, run into:
1. The One Who Smells
This is by far the worst offender. You’re minding your own business, sitting in your seat, maybe reading or listening to music and then all of a sudden, someone sits down next to you and you know right away. They’re a smelly one. Sometimes it’s the smell of B.O., cigarettes, or even too much cologne or perfume. It doesn’t really matter which of those it is, they’re pretty much all bad. Then you think, “Should I get up and move to another seat? Would that offend them? Do I really care? They were offending me first! Maybe I can wait it out, there’s only like 20 min left of the ride.” And you have that inner dialogue until the ride is over.
2. The One Who's on the Phone
Without fail, there is always, ALWAYS, someone that’s on the phone on the train, and you’re always the one sitting next to them. A lot of the times these conversations revolve around food. What should they make for dinner tonight, or where should they order from… I guess people on trains just get really hungry! Anyway, you’re sitting there, wanting to give your opinion like, “Yes, you should get Chinese, Chinese is the best thing ever,” but you know you can’t give your two cents because then they’ll know that you’ve been eavesdropping. Then you’re thinking, “…Maybe I should get Chinese tonight…” and you blame these people for the amount that you order take out.
3. The One Who Snores
You feel bad for these people at first. You’re like, “Aw man, snoring in public, that’s embarrassing, and oh, oh no… now they’re drooling.” You feel for them. Then after a couple minutes of pity, you start to get annoyed. You’re just trying to read “Harry Potter and The Cursed Child” in peace and then all of a sudden you hear the rumbling of the snore and you know it’s coming; the loudest snore you’ve ever heard. Sometimes these people wake themselves up because they snore so loud, and then you smile to yourself because that’s definitely happened to you before (hopefully not in public). In the end, you’re just jealous that they’re getting some extra shut-eye in and you’re not!
4. The One Who's a Little Too Friendly
Don’t they know this is New York City? We don’t talk to people we don’t know here! We keep to ourselves and judge other people silently, that’s just what we do! But these people, they like to start conversation and in your head you’re thinking, “What’s wrong with these people? Talking? Being Friendly? What is this all about?” You go with it, smiling and nodding, because what else are you supposed to do? You really don’t even know what they’ve been saying the last 10 minutes because you were too busy being confused, and then all of a sudden, you realize they just asked you a question. You panic for a second, and then relief washes over you as you realize that you’re at your stop and you can avoid the question all together.
Then... there's YOU... But we probably shouldn't go down that road!