No matter where you are from (especially if it's Wisconsin), there's a pretty solid chance you've heard about this place. Perhaps you heard of it on the news, in an episode of Family Guy, obscure references from That 70's Show or 80's films, you probably have a grandma from the area, or you've had a Sheboygan-style brat in Las Vegas.*
So if you're from Sheboygan (not to be confused with Cheboygan, Michigan), born and raised or just raised, put your hands up. Here are some things that may hit home if you're from the Bratwurst Capital of the World
*Don't believe me? Go google it.
1. Everyone has so much trouble trying to pronounce "Sheboygan"
It's phonetic, y'all. PHONETIC.
2. You get this face when you tell them it's "The Malibu of the Midwest"
While this is only vaild in summer, we have the beaches, the nightlife, the lifestyle. I SWEAR. I DID NOT MAKE THIS UP.
3. When the movie Surf's Up came out, everyone in town lost their shit
I saw this in theaters, and the entire audience ERUPTED with cheers when this came on screen.
4. You wrote your initials on the lighthouse
You did it either because 1) all your friends did, 2) you wanted to seem badass, or 3) you and your crush wanted to write your initials in a heart.
But then the city would repaint it every other year and you'd have to redo it.
5. You tried to bring your crush to make out at North Point
And your dad would try to keep you from going.
6. You're still not over the loss of Big Wheel Skate Rink
Everyone had their birthday there, you begged your mom to let you go to the overnight lock-ins, and you spent all of your arcade tickets on the cheap roll-on lip gloss.
And you cried when they announced they were selling out.
7. Brat Days was a highlight of your summer
Because brats. And music. And rides. And more brats. And concerts. And brat eating contests. And parades. And even more brats.
8. North vs South
Whether it be between North High and South High, or the Northside and the Southside, everyone in town has their allegiance to one side or the other. Even if your best friend lived on the opposite side of the city, you'd be rivals for North/South basketball games.
9. You're still laughing about the drunken boat pier incident
Because this is #ClassicSheboygan
10. You grew up with bars on every corner
Cities without copious amounts of bars feel strange to you.
11. Kohler toilets
Sheboygan has a gorgeous art museum, but you go just to see the elaborate bathrooms. Now, wherever you do your business, you get excited when the toilet you're on says "Kohler"
12. You went to Polar Bear Plunge
Maybe you're crazy and went in or you just went to watch, this is the best way to ring in the new year.
(Plus this Polar Bear Plunge is way more intense than basically any other Polar Bear Plunge ever.)
13. 4th of July is the best day of the year
The city is ALIVE and buzzing with activity. And you always went to the beach at Deland Park because it felt like Spring Break in Cabo.
14. You're constantly surprised by the street art all over the city.
For being a small city, we have stunning big city street art.
(Except for that claw thing in the 8th Street roundabout. Nobody knows what's up with that.)
15. Hmong food is bae
Despite the German influence, there's a pretty big Hmong demographic in Sheboygan. A lot of us either were part of that community or had friends in that community, so we all grew up with the best homemade egg rolls and Pho restaurants around.
16. The Memorial Mall is the biggest joke you've ever seen
*the meme says it all*
17. You claim you're BFFs with Sam Dekker
I went to that one party with him that one time and even I pretend that I knew him.
You probably do the same thing.
18. Beer brats and hard rolls are life
So stereotypical but SO DAMN GOOD.
19. Life IS cooler by the lake
When you're not in Sheboygan, you wish you were boating, or day drinking on the beach, or playing beach volleyball, or fishing off one of the piers, etc. Lake Michigan is home.
20. Your life is either made or ruined by the PGA
If you love golf: This is the best thing ever!
If you don't: We already have enough tourists in the summer/this is too much/I don't even care about golf/make it STAHP.
21. You still don't know if you grew up in a midwest city or a beach town
Summer: Straight up beach town
Every other time of the year: Midwest town
22. The Symbol of Freedom is a thing
Sheb is home of the tallest flagpole in the country. And we're still bitter over Obama not coming to the ribbon cutting.
23. Seagulls are annoying, but they make you feel at home
They're little rat-with-wings bastards, but their screeches are weirdly comforting.
24. You probably had your senior pics at Kohler-Andre.
Just look at that view. Of course you want this in the background to mask the sheer terror in your eyes of realizing you have to be an adult in a few months.
25. There's a Wisconsin accent, then there's a Sheboygan accent.
Y'all though a Sconnie accent was bad. This is a whole other ballgame.
26. You Refer to it by its nicknames:
SheVegas, SheBangBang, SheBahgdad, Sheb, etc
Saying "Sheboygan" sounds a little weird.
27. 8th Street Drawbridge can ruin your day
It doesn't go up often but when it does it makes you go "WHAT THE HECK? WHO MADE THIS CALL? HELL NAH! I GOT THINGS TO DO! NOOOOOOOO!"
28. Oostburg, Sheb Falls, Plymouth, Kohler, Cleveland, LTC and Lakeland kids always came to your city for fun
But then we'd turn around and go to Milwaukee.
29. "Walking the Bowl" was the most important day of your life
Walking the Bowl = every high school graduation all at once
30. Surfing is a part of life, whether you catch waves or not
It's a real thing. Not even kidding. There's a surf competition every September. I used to teach surfing lessons. We made it on the Today Show because of it. #FreshwaterSurfingCaptialOfTheWorld
31. Above and Beyond was your shit
The DOPEST children's museum ever. All of the cool kids had birthday parties here.
32. Blue Harbor Resort and Spa
All the summer tourists come here in the summer. You and your family/friends came here year around. The waterpark was your favorite place as a kid. You probably know at least three people who worked here.
33. So many summer festivals
Greek Fest, Johnsonville Brat Days, Venetian Boat Parade, Independence Day festivities, Slovenian Fest, JMKAC Midsummer Festival of the Arts, Zydeco Fest, Surf Fests...
34. Sledding at Kiwanis Park was the best way to spend a snow day
They have the best, biggest, and steepest hills anywhere. Nothing else compares.
35. The weirdest news comes from SheBangBang, so you're not phased by anything
Sounds normal.
36. It's a Bubbler
Only heathens call it a "drinking fountain".
37. There were always drunk people wherever you go
Wherever, whenever you go, there's always a drunk guy.