1. How did I get home?

2. How much did I drink last night?

3. Oh no. What is my Snapchat story?

4. I think I'm dying.

5. Why did I do this to myself?

6. I can’t move.

7. I need Advil now.

8. And a fat ice coffee with a bagel.

9. Water is a necessity.

10. *checks phone*

11. I suck.

12. Why do bad things happen to good people?

13. I think I am going to vomit.

14. Someone get me saltines and ginger ale.

15. I hope I didn’t drunk eat last night.

16. The room will not stop spinning.

17. Annnd I’m sweating.

18. I am never going out again.

19. I just don’t understand myself.

20. Who let me dance on an elevated surface?

21. And who spilled beer in my hair?

22. Why am I still in my jeans?

23. Where is my ID and credit card?

24. I hope all of my friends survived.

25. Why did I drink tequila?

26. I can’t watch any Snapchat stories.

27. Should I shower?

28. I should probably stop making dumb decisions.

29. When the f*ck did I order pizza?

30. *checks text messages*

31. *silently curses self out*

32. I don’t remember anything.

33. That's it, I'm allergic to alcohol.

34. And it's safe to say I'm never drinking ever again.

Until... *12 hours later*