Whether you're a choreographer, a dancer, or someone who's ever watched a rehearsal before, you know that every choreographer has certain things that they say or do that the cast or team just has learned to understand. For example, when I teach, I tend to lose all my ability to speak like a normal person. I think we can all agree that these 30 comments are things that EVERY choreographer makes at one point or another.
1. "One more time."
This. Is. Such. A. Lie.
2. "Keep the energy up."
3. "Please stop talking."
This is simply how it starts.
4. "Guys! Really stop talking."
Then you get a little more serious.
5. "SHUT UP!"
Finally, you've snapped. You probably feel bad afterwards for yelling until they start to talk again.
6. *silence* "I'm waiting."
You know the choreographer means business when you get this response.
7. "The sooner we finish this, the sooner we go home."
8. "It's really not that hard."
Seriously, it's only a few turns into a switch leap then a backflip into the audience while carefully balancing a flaming baton. How hard can that be?
9. "Push yourself a little farther."
10. "If you are not sweating, you're probably not doing it right."
11. "SHARPER!"
Everything and anything must be exactly together.
12. "Give me more energy!"
13. "Please don't give me dead faces. You guys look like zombies."
14. "Be careful!"
I know, at least for me, I hold my breath every time a dancer does something slightly dangerous, even if I choreographed it because so much could go wrong.
15. "That was good, but (insert 3000 different notes and critiques)"
16. "I know I said to do it this way, but try it this way instead."
Choreographer: Do it this way.
Student: But you said to do it this way before.
Choreographer: Well I lied. Do it this way instead.
Student: *confused af*
17. "This time go full out."
18. "Point your toe."
19. "QUIET FEET!"
I tell my cast to "NOT KILL THE COCKROACHES!"
20. *counts on beat, and then counts in half time*
Student: What beat does this happen on.
Choreographer: It's on...wait a second? *questions all means of prior teaching*
21. "Do as I say, not as I do."
22. "Almost done." (in reality, there is still over half the warm up left.)
23. "Why aren't you guys doing this?"
Students: You never told us to.
Choreographer: Oh...well I'm telling you now so fix it.
24. "YAS! That was perfect! Now let's do it ten more times."
25. "Do it again to make sure it wasn't an accident."
26. "Focus please."
27. "Oh wait...I guess I should give you a break."
Sometimes you get to into it, and you forget that your dancers may be dying behind you.
28. "Nice job today! Now make sure to review everything we did for tomorrow."
In reality, 90% of the class will not go home after a long rehearsal and continue to dance.
29. "Remember the choreography." *thinks to self: because I sure won't.*
As a choreographer you have too many other dances in your head. Ain't nobody got time for that!
30. "I'M SO PROUD OF YOU GUYS!!!!!!"
In the end you love them all like your children...even if their your peers as in my case.
I just want to give a quick little shoutout to my Leap Of Faith family for being the inspiration to write this article. You guys are truly the best and a dream to any choreographer.
