When people think of Florida, they think of a place of perpetual sunshine, sweet smelling orange groves and theme parks that stir up the inner child in you and inspire you to dream. As a native Floridian, I've come to realize that there's a lot more to our magnificent state than the perception of animated tourists. The beauty and traditions of my city of Clermont in particular distinguish it from any other city in Florida.
It's a city not many have heard of. If it were in the Jonas Brothers band, then it would play the role of Frankie. (If you have no idea who that is, then my point is made.) But anyone who lives in this warm town recognizes its quirk and its charm. So, with that, I give you 30 signs every Clermont resident can identify with. Welcome to our beautiful city, the choice of champions.
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1. When giving directions to anywhere in Clermont, the words "50" and "27" are bound to come out of your mouth at some point.
2. If you're trying to avoid any sort of social interaction, then do not go to Chick-fil-A.
3. Or Gold's Gym actually because everybody and their mother works out there. Who needs a healthy heart and a long life anyways?
4. In fact, if you don't want to see anyone you know, your best bet is to stay inside your own house.
5. You've given up trying to describe to non-Floridians where you're from. As far as they're concerned, you live in Orlando.
6. There's never such a thing as an easy run. Welcome to the city of hills.
7. On the plus side, you also know hurricanes can't touch you. Thank you to the city of hills.
8. By now, it shouldn't be rare for you to see Olympians training at the NTC. (But you still get starstruck and ask for a picture every time.)
9. When compiling a list of people who have changed your life, Panna is on there for upgrading your eyebrow game.
10. You've heard to use the North Star as a navigational guide when you get a lost. Well, we have a North Star too: the Citrus Tower Building.
11. In elementary school, it was common to go on a field trip to Universal, Busch Gardens, or Seaworld and you best believe it was going to be the best day of your life.
12. People assume you go to Disney on the daily just because you're less than thirty minutes away from it.
13. And each time, you pretend you're too cool for it.
14. Even though you know you have a seasonal pass or a ticket dealer who works at Disney and could hook you up.
15. If a new movie comes out, you can bet there will be a reunion of everybody that you know at Epic Theaters opening night.
16. Big basketball game on TV? Go to Buffalo Wild Wings. Big football game going on? Go to Buffalo Wild Wings. Any event that involves a ball and men driven by testosterone and the desire to crush their competition? You better be at Buffalo Wild Wings.
17. When you got straight A's, you not only made your mom proud, but you also got tickets to the Orlando Magic games (which you may or may not have utilized.)
18. You know well enough there's never going to be a concert in your town, so be prepared to drive to Orlando, Tampa, or Miami if you really want to see Beyonce.
19. Everyone knows the true OG high school rivalry was between the Knights and Eagles. (Until the Hawks swooped in and made it this awkward love triangle.)
20. There's only one college rivalry that seems to matter: UF vs. FSU.
21. The greatest accomplishment of your young life was either being a Terrific Kid or learning how to pronounce "Park Palatlakaha." (For me, it was the first because I still don't know how to pronounce Park Palatlakaha.)
22. Christmas just wouldn't be Christmas without Light Up Clermont.
23. And come spring time, you know you'll be at Pig on the Pond for its funnel cake and fried Oreos.
24. When Halloween rolls around, you know Legends is where the good candy is at. (Trust me here. This is a tried and true test. I'm an expert.)
25. You never have to worry about finding a Christmas tree because you know some athletic team will be having a Christmas tree fundraiser.
26. You have to drive at least an hour to get to a good beach.
27. And yet, you are surrounded by water everywhere you turn. (Fun fact: There are eleven lakes in Clermont.)
28. When people try to tell you your town is irrelevant, you already have a mental list of prominent people who are from here to shut the haters up. (Thank you, Tyson Gay and Kaylin Whitney for representing.)
29. People always seem to be complaining about what a small town Clermont is and how they can't wait to get out.
30. But no matter how much you complain about our quaint little town, you know that there's no other place with its level of hospitality or a greater sense of home.
