About a year ago, I started watching Bob’s Burgers on Netflix. I was a hardcore Simpsons fan at the time and assumed that the show was going to be another miserable satirical cartoon that FOX produced, but I was wrong. So very, very wrong. In present day, Bob’s Burgers is basically my favorite show ever and much to my dismay, it’s being removed from Netflix in a few weeks. And while I can still watch it on demand or on sketchy corners of the internet, I’m feeling kinda sad that I’m not going to have easy access to the show anymore. So what exactly made me turn from a Simpsons fanatic to a Bob’s Burgers supporter? One character, four syllables: Tina. Belcher. Behind the thick glasses, knee high socks, and bangs lies an icon. With her prominent sexuality and awkwardness, Tina resides in the hearts of many. It didn’t take me very long to figure out that this lady was not only my favorite character on the show, but also my spirit animal. Let’s take a look back on some of Tina’s greatest moments and qualities.
1. When she asked the question on everyone’s mind.
2. She knows what she wants in life. In season 1 episode 6, it’s Tina’s 13th birthday and she’s determined to enter womanhood with a bang by having a romantic first kiss under the disco ball with her crush Jimmy Jr. Sure, her birthday party is unconventional with a mustache-less Bob and an abundance of transvestite hookers, but the ending scene is one of the best things you’ll ever see. In case you don’t believe me, I had the courtesy of linking it down below.
3. She's not afraid to mix things up. In season 2 episode 5, the family moves the restaurant to the food truck business. After mistakenly being called “Dina”, Tina decides to embody this name and become a more audacious version of herself. She even switches the side her barrette goes on.
4. She's not afraid to be a little competitive.
5. She doesn't let anything get in the way of love..... After Linda gets a job at the new grocery store, Tina starts hanging out behind the milk fridge to spy on people. It’s there that she meets a mysterious boy, but time tears them apart. What does she have to remember him by? A dirty band-aid from his finger where a turtle bit him. She then embarks on a conquest to find this mystery boy with the help of Gene and Louise. It’s basically like Cinderella but with a bandage and lots of lactose.
6. .....not even diarrhea. It’s Valentine’s Day at Wagstaff Elementary and Jimmy Jr. wants him and Tina to jump on the trampoline to have the ultimate “sky kiss”. One problem: Tina can’t leave the toilet due to a bad case of diarrhea. But love always finds a way… with the help of some stilts.
7. Her obsession with butts hilariously unbelievable.
8. When she did this head nod.
9. Her passion for horses will make you laugh until you cry. Season 6 episode 17 has to be my favorite because Tina finally lives out her dream: going to horse camp. Sure, her horse’s name is Plops and he absolutely hates her, but that didn’t stop her from performing in the camp’s final exhibition. Luckily her imaginary horse Jericho was there and she shined brighter than the sun.
10. Her running
11. Her dancing.
12. When she gave witchcraft ago. To be fair, she did get cursed and all her spells were pure coincidence, but her confidence skyrocketed and that it certainly something to envy. And TBH, that choker made her pretty bad ass.
13. When she was all of us trying to put makeup on for the first time.
14. When she went through her sassy and rebellious teenage phase. We all go through this phase in life and our beloved Tina is no exception. In a desperate attempt to impress the new popular girl at school, Tina raids her mom's liquor, starts wearing makeup, and develops quite an attitude. There are some great one-liners in this episode (season 2 episode 8 BTW). Don't have a crap attack.
15. Her sleeping habits are strange yet comical.
16. When Bob let her drive the car. I remember being a nervous wreck when I first learned how to drive a car, but I don’t think I was anywhere near this bad. Somehow, she managed to hit the only car in the parking lot. It’s okay Tina, you’re still my queen.
17. Anytime she does this.Props to Dan Mintz who voices Tina. I've tried time and time again and I just can't get the moan right.
18. When she gave dating the supernatural a try. Yeah, Jeff wasn’t a real ghost and it was just a box full of air, but at least she put herself out there?
20. Her heart overrides her head sometimes. In the episode “Can’t Buy Me Math”, Tina teams up with fellow nerd Darryl to win their school’s “Cupid’s Couple” award at the Valentine’s Dance, so they can rise to popularity and date people that were originally out of their league. She warned Darryl that he would probably fall for her, but she fell for him instead. Oh, how the tables turned.
21. Her imagination is creative and innovative. Three words: erotic friend fiction.
22. Her bilingual skills are fire.
23. When she realized she doesn’t need a man to be a smart, strong, sensual woman. The Belcher kids and some of their friends explore the taffy factory that’s due for demolition to find lost treasure, and Tina thinks this is the perfect opportunity to be a damsel in distress so Jimmy Jr. will save her. This teenage feminist realized that you don’t need boys to be heroes, you can be one all on your own and she saves the day.
24. She can be a little rebellious from time to time. In order to prove to her schoolmates that she isn’t boring, Tina joins fellow classmate Jordan and graffitis the whole town. At the end of the day, Tina realizes that she likes being Tina more than trying to impress other people. Plus, she had another romantic fling in this episode, which is always entertaining.
25. When she was certain of her place in this world. Same, Tina. Same.
26. When she discovered it takes a lot of guts to be yourself, literally. In the episode titled “Quirk Duckers”, Tina channels her quirky nature into a musical to perform in front of the school before Thanksgiving break. While Gene and Louise strive to ruin the play so they get sent home early, Tina pours her heart into its production. After Louise explodes gizzards and giblets all over the audience, Tina saves the day and preaches that being yourself is the best thing you can do, even if you’re quirky.
Let's all raise our glasses to the fabulous Tina Belcher.
