I still don’t have it all figured out or anywhere close, but as my quarter life century comes to a close and eagerly holds the door open for my 26th year, I realize that I’ve been lucky enough to do some pretty amazing things along the way. To live a life I could have only dreamt of when I was still little and deciding what to be when I grew up. So maybe it’s just a little hint of nostalgia, however I can’t help but look back on all the birthdays and years that brought me to this point.
Like, growing up with an older brother, whose birthday is only a week after mine and realizing that your shared birthday party is actually just his party you got invited to. And while this would sometimes become the root of all my evil, I eventually learned to accept that sharing my day with my oldest brother wasn’t so bad. This allowed me to be the sassy little diva that I was and I secretly knew I would have all the attention for the rest of the year.
It hasn’t always been a party, though.
When I was 17, I came face-to-face with death and for a moment. I never thought I’d get to have that shared birthday party again, but when I kicked the idea of dying to the side, I came out alive with a championship scar printed on my right shoulder; a little souvenir I would never not be proud of. A little symbol of just how stubborn I really can be.
As much as I once hated to reference the idea of almost not making it past my 18th year or the idea of people having some sort of sympathy for me, I now realize that without this small factor in my life, I wouldn’t have done half the things I’ve done.
Like, having the chance to jump out off of a perfectly good airplane in San Diego, zip-lining through the jungles of Mexico or climbing through the mountains of beautiful Colorado. I once packed my entire life and moved to New York City for a summer, to a small Brooklyn apartment, adjacent to the subway that rode me into Manhattan everyday, where I lived with two complete strangers who I would now consider life long friends. I was heartbroken when I made the decision to leave, but quickly realized that everything happens for a reason because only three short months later, I made my way to Milano, Italy, where I spent the next six months of my life.
I lived out every girl’s dream of having an Italian boyfriend, in the beautiful and romantic land of Italy, but was quickly snapped back to reality when I realized it was never actually my dream. My dream never involved a guy, who made me feel like less of a person or who tried to change the wild spirit within me, by forcing me to stay still. My dream was bigger than that, more wild and carefree than what’s normal or understandable.
I’ve made some mistakes along, acted in selfish behaviors and done things that I’m not so proud, like drinking too many adult beverages before the circus or tailgating too early and for too long. I’ve broken more bones than necessary and with each cast has been a story that makes telling a little on the embarrassing side, like the time I snapped my right forearm doing the hokey pokey on skates or when I let my temper got the best of me and punched a refrigerator.
I’ve met some incredible people along the way, who have always been around to support my adventures and love me even when we’re in different time zones. I’ve made friends out of strangers, strangers out of friends and lost people too early in their lives. I’ve had my heart broken a few times and I’m sure I’ve done my fair share of breaking, but with each new “hello," I’ve come to learn the importance of everyone that crosses my path. And while I may not have it all figured or live the life of an average, soon-to-be, 26-year-old with thoughts of families, careers and white picket fences, I like to think that I’m doing pretty OK.
So, as I close the chapter to my 25th year, I can’t help but to kiss it goodbye, as I double cheek, kiss 26 hello, and welcome in the newest adventure of spending my next year in the beautiful land of the Ivory Coast in Africa. I welcome in all the new adventures, people and stories I’ll have to tell but for now, I’ll be enjoying the last days of being 25, so cheers to finales and new beginnings!