25 Things I Wanna Say to the Girl That's Glamorous as F*** | The Odyssey Online
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25 Things I Wanna Say to the Girl That's Glamorous as F***

Can you just, like, wear sweatpants and watch The Bachelor with me?

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25 Things I Wanna Say to the Girl That's Glamorous as F***
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To the girl that wakes up and works out in the early morning hours while I'm sleeping off a hangover. To the girl that wears a dress to class every day while I wear what I slept in. To the girl that basically has her s*** together while I panic about what I'm eating for breakfast. This is for you.

1. I'm assuming you wake up early everyday...

Usually, without an alarm.

2. ...and look like this

You literally look like the actors when they "wake up" in a movie (WE KNOW YOU DON'T WAKE UP LIKE THAT!)

3. ...and go work out...

Usually in a perfectly coordinated outfit.

4. ...and still look hot.

HOW ARE YOU HUMAN?

5. You have a full array of bath bombs, body lotions, body sprays, and perfumes in your arsenal.

Your collection is so extensive you usually can coordinate them with your moods (i.e light and fruity when you just looked at your perfect cuticles).

6. In fact, you take a bath regularly


Which I'm pretty sure is the most glamorous activity ever.

7. You exfoliate and moisturize.


Which makes your legs like super shiny like the tears I cry when I see how perfect you are.

8. You basically look like this whenever you enter a room.

It's basically like saying "I'M HERE!" without opening your mouth.

9.You never forget to take your makeup off after a drunk night out.

Which is something I forget even when I'm not blacked out.

10. And you even remember to apply toner.

And you actually know the purpose of it.

11. You always shave your legs...


Not just on Thursdays.

12. And never miss a spot...

Not by the ankle, not by the back of the knee, not even on the big toe.

13. ... literally ever.

I commend your commitment and mourn my own inability to do so.

15. Your nails are always perfectly manicured.

Usually with the hottest spring color. Meanwhile, mine have been chipping off for the last month and a half.

16. You wear a perfectly coordinated outfit every day.


And are totally not an outfit repeater.

17. And you probably don't even own a pair of sweatpants.

Meanwhile, I'm more on the Regina George train.

18. You wash your makeup brushes in your spare time.

Wait, you're supposed to clean them?

19. Your bra and underwear always match.

Which is like so much effort I can't comprehend it.

20. You have a different scented candle to burn every day.

Which explains why you always make me crave a cookie.

21. That new makeup product that everyone is obsessed about? You've got it.

Can I has?

22. And mastered it.

Alright, let's be honest. You're killin' it.

23. You feel more comfortable in a dress than in leggings.

And somehow, you don't look like you're wearing a nightgown.

24. You're the girl they use as an example in yoga.

Tbh, I probably can't even touch my toes.

25. I want to be friends with you because you seem like a cool person.

Also, I want you to teach me your ways.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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