Sometimes, there are things in life we desperately do not want to do. Checking grades is one of the things I absolutely detest in life. It is quite literally the bane of my existence. For some reason, my desire to jump into a volcano grows immensely whenever I even think about going online to check my grades. Even if I know I did a decent job, I just do not want to check them. Like, ever. Here’s a list of things I would much rather do than check my grades!

• Do laundry
• Lick a hobo’s foot
• Go to the dentist and get 12 cavities filled
• Clean every Taco Bell bathroom in the state
• Come home to this

• Watch “Shrek is Love, Shrek Is Life” 30 times in a row
• Eat 200 chicken nuggets and not share with anyone
• Sit through Thanksgiving dinner with all my extended family
• Live an entire year without internet access
• Go to a Trump rally

• Tell my friend there’s spinach stuck in her teeth after she talks to her crush
• Read a textbook about snails
• Serenade a total stranger
• Go to the gym and see someone I hate
• Re-live middle school

• Dance in public with no background music
• Learn how to play the bassoon
• Sell all my sister’s closet without telling her
• Go to the DMV
• Fall into a ditch then just lay there, sad and desperate

• Give a terrible speech
• Bang my head on a table, until there are bruises and splinters on my forehead
• Listen to “Gangnam Style” on repeat for a week
• Flirt with a very attractive person, then get rejected
• Cry