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25 Things Every Kitten Owner Says Daily

#KittenProblems

Courtney McMonagle

Jan 30, 2017

Wilkes University

Courtney McMonagle

I have a 2.5 month old kitten, and she can be a handful. Here are 25 things I say every day because of her, and 25 things I know every kitten parent has said!

1. What are you doing?

2. Where did you go?

3. What are you eating?

4. Where did you even get that?

5. Stop that!

6. Do not attack the older cat/dog..

7. Why are you all wet?

8. OW!

9. cursing

10. Get over here!

11. You’re going to miss the counter, I guarantee it.

12. laughing uncontrollably at kitten’s antics

13. Stop eating the plant. I like that plant.

14. Don’t eat the garbage..ew…

15. Yay, what a big girl/boy! You finally made that jump!

16. kiss-y sounds

17. LOVE ME

18. Oh…so sweet. pets kitten

19. This is totally Insta worthy…takes pic of kitten sleeping adorably

20. imitates kitten sounds

21. Quit attacking my feet..

22. DON’T GO UP THERE, STUPID, WHAT ARE YOU DOING!

23. Now what do you have?

24. You’re not allowed to have that. Here, play with this piece of squash.

25. I wove you, little baby kitty.

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25 Things Every Kitten Owner Says Daily

#KittenProblems

1. What are you doing?

2. Where did you go?3. What are you eating?4. Where did you even get that?5. Stop that!

6. Do not attack the older cat/dog..7. Why are you all wet?8. OW!9. *cursing*10. Get over here!11. You’re going to miss the counter, I guarantee it.12. *laughing uncontrollably at kitten’s antics*

13. Stop eating the plant. I like that plant.

14. Don’t eat the garbage..ew…15. Yay, what a big girl/boy! You finally made that jump!16. *kiss-y sounds*17. LOVE ME18. Oh…so sweet. *pets kitten*

19. This is totally Insta worthy…*takes pic of kitten sleeping adorably*

20. *imitates kitten sounds*21. Quit attacking my feet..22. DON’T GO UP THERE, STUPID, WHAT ARE YOU DOING!23. Now what do you have?24. You’re not allowed to have that. Here, play with this piece of squash.25. I wove you, little baby kitty.

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All names should be "unisex names."

1. Communicating via email can be awkward.

2. Appointments usually accompany weird looks.

3. Introducing yourself to someone is never without a hitch.

4. You’ve probably thought about changing your name.

5. You’re often asked why you have the name you do.

6. You get excited when you meet someone of your gender with your name.

7. You feel awkward when you meet someone of the opposite gender with your name.

8. You’ve had someone say to you, “I knew a [your name], but they were [your opposite gender].”

9. You’ve heard a bad joke/pick-up line or two about your name before.

10. People are surprised when they see you.

11. You’re extra sensitive to other unique or unisex names.

12. You’ve fought with your parents about it.

13. All things considered, you’re happy your name makes you unique.

You know that all of these things apply to you. You'll just never tell.

I get it... I'm pale.

1. At least I can't lose you in a crowd!

2. Oh my goodness your skin is like glow-in-the-dark.

3. Can't you just get fake tan?

4. Do you tan or just burn?

5. Your kids are going to look like Casper the Friendly Ghost!

6. *holds arm against your arm* Look how much darker I am compared to you!

7. *holds pale arm against another pale arm* Aw, at least you're darker than her!

8. I laid out by the pool almost every day over break!

9. I haven't used sunscreen since I was, like, five.

10. *adjusts selfie lighting to their face* Oops, where'd you go??

11. *after working out* Your face is SO red!

12. *wears white* Look! You're all one color!

13. You need to get some sun.

14. Aren't you excited for summer?

The struggle bus is real.

1. Child prodigies:

2. Hearing other musicians in the practice room next door and accepting that you will never be as talented as them:

3. That anxiety that takes over before every performance:

4. Taking a million 0 credit classes:

5. When there's a paper due the next day, but you have to attend yet another concert in order to pass a 0 credit class:

6. When your friends try to encourage you after a performance, even though you are criticizing everything in your mind:

7. Knowing that there's always that one professor during juries:

8. The oh-so-attractive band/choir uniforms:

9. Realizing that a college campus is maybe not the best atmosphere to finish your latest composition:

10. Hearing "Oh, you sing opera? I LOVE Phantom of the Opera!" for the hundredth time:

11. When people think finals week is a breeze for you.

12. When you're drowning in the stress that comes with 18+ credits (and not to mention all those 0 credit classes) and people ask you how you are:

13. When it all comes down to it, though, you know that at the end of the day, music is your passion:

Because you need it in your life.

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2. Where did you go?

3. What are you eating?

4. Where did you even get that?

5. Stop that!

6. Do not attack the older cat/dog..

7. Why are you all wet?

8. OW!

9. cursing

10. Get over here!

11. You’re going to miss the counter, I guarantee it.

12. laughing uncontrollably at kitten’s antics

14. Don’t eat the garbage..ew…

15. Yay, what a big girl/boy! You finally made that jump!

16. kiss-y sounds

17. LOVE ME

18. Oh…so sweet. pets kitten

19. This is totally Insta worthy…takes pic of kitten sleeping adorably

20. imitates kitten sounds

21. Quit attacking my feet..

22. DON’T GO UP THERE, STUPID, WHAT ARE YOU DOING!

23. Now what do you have?

24. You’re not allowed to have that. Here, play with this piece of squash.

25. I wove you, little baby kitty.

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6. holds arm against your arm Look how much darker I am compared to you!

7. holds pale arm against another pale arm Aw, at least you're darker than her!

10. adjusts selfie lighting to their face Oops, where'd you go??

11. after working out Your face is SO red!

12. wears white Look! You're all one color!