Recommended for you

Start writing a post

Lifestyle

25 Days Of Christmas Jokes

An advent calendar that gives you laughs instead of chocolates!

Samantha Keenan

Nov 29, 2017

Butler University

1617

The Daily Meal

ABC Family, now known as Freeform, has always done "25 Days of Christmas", and since that has become a beloved holiday tradition, I figured I would try my hand at creating a new holiday tradition for The Odyssey, 25 Days of Christmas Jokes. Think of this as your latest advent calendar, but instead of giving you chocolate, it gives you laughs.

1. What do you get if Santa goes down the chimney when a fire is lit?

Krisp Kringle!

2. What happened to the man who stole the advent calendar?

He got 25 days!

3. How does Christmas Day end?

With a 'y'!

4. What is the best Christmas present in the world?

A broken drum- you just can't beat it!

5. What do you get when you eat Christmas decorations?

Tinsilitis!

6. What is the worst disease you can get at Christmas?

Eczemas!

7. What's green, covered in tinsel, and goes "ribbet ribbet"?

A mistle-toad!

8. Why are Christmas trees such bad knitters?

They're always losing their needles!

9. What's the name of the horse mentioned in the song "Jingle Bells"?

Bob! (Bells on Bob's tail ring!)

10. Did you know that Santa's not allowed to go down chimneys this year?

It was declared unsafe by the Elf and Safety Commission.

11. What is Santa's favorite place to deliver Christmas presents?

Idaho-ho-ho!

12. What is claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus!

13. What kind of motorcycle does Santa drive?

A Holly Davidson!

14. Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet!

15. What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!

16. What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less!

17. What do cats and dogs call Santa Claus?

Santa Paws!

18. What do you call a cat sitting on a beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws!

19. What is Scrooge's favorite Christmas carol?

Silent Night!

20. What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The elfabet!

21. What kind of breakfast cereal does Frosty the Snowman eat?

Frosted Flakes!

22. What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas!

23. Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed!

24. What does the Christmas-hating sheep say?

Baaaaaaaa humbug!

25. What do you call a kid who doesn't believe in Santa?

A rebel without a Claus!

Happy Holidays!

Thank you to https://www.whychristmas.com/fun/cracker_jokes.sht... and http://www.funology.com/christmas-jokes/ for these hilarious jokes.

From Your Site Articles

None ›

Report this Content

This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

Student Life

28 Daily Thoughts of College Students

"I want to thank Google, Wikipedia, and whoever else invented copy and paste. Thank you."

Kennesaw State University

387

group of people sitting on bench near trees duting daytime

Photo by Naassom Azevedo on Unsplash

I know every college student has daily thoughts throughout their day. Whether you're walking on campus or attending class, we always have thoughts running a mile a minute through our heads. We may be wondering why we even showed up to class because we'd rather be sleeping, or when the professor announces that we have a test and you have an immediate panic attack.

Keep Reading...Show less

daily life

Lifestyle

The Great Christmas Movie Debate

"A Christmas Story" is the star on top of the tree.

Seton Hall University

1752

Mental Floss

One staple of the Christmas season is sitting around the television watching a Christmas movie with family and friends. But of the seemingly hundreds of movies, which one is the star on the tree? Some share stories of Santa to children ("Santa Claus Is Coming to Town"), others want to spread the Christmas joy to adults ("It's a Wonderful Life"), and a select few are made to get laughs ("Elf"). All good movies, but merely ornaments on the Christmas tree of the best movies. What tops the tree is a movie that bridges the gap between these three movies, and makes it a great watch for anyone who chooses to watch it. Enter the timeless Christmas classic, "A Christmas Story." Created in 1983, this movie holds the tradition of capturing both young and old eyes for 24 straight hours on its Christmas Day marathon. It gets the most coverage out of all holiday movies, but the sheer amount of times it's on television does not make it the greatest. Why is it,
then? A Christmas Story does not try to tell the tale of a Christmas miracle or use Christmas magic to move the story. What it does do though is tell the real story of Christmas. It is relatable and brings out the unmatched excitement of children on Christmas in everyone who watches. Every one becomes a child again when they watch "A Christmas Story."

Keep Reading...Show less

christmas movie

Student Life

15 Thoughts Going Through Your Head Before Finals

Who isn't stressing out over finals right now?

Philadelphia University

870

student thinking about finals in library

StableDiffusion

As this semester wraps up, students can’t help but be stressed about finals. After all, our GPAs depends on these grades! What student isn’t worrying about their finals right now? It’s “goodbye social life, hello library” time from now until the end of finals week.

1. Finals are weeks away, I’m sure I’ll be ready for them when they come.

Keep Reading...Show less

finals

Student Life

The 5 Phases Of Finals

May the odds be ever in your favor.

Essex County, NJ

2455

Gurl.com

It’s here; that time of year when college students turn into preschoolers again. We cry for our mothers, eat everything in sight, and whine when we don’t get our way. It’s finals, the dreaded time of the semester when we all realize we should have been paying attention in class instead of literally doing anything else but that. Everyone has to take them, and yes, unfortunately, they are inevitable. But just because they are here and inevitable does not mean they’re peaches and cream and full of rainbows. Surviving them is a must, and the following five phases are a reality for all majors from business to art, nursing to history.

Keep Reading...Show less

finals

Recommended for you

25 Days Of Christmas Jokes

An advent calendar that gives you laughs instead of chocolates!

1. What do you get if Santa goes down the chimney when a fire is lit?

Krisp Kringle!

2. What happened to the man who stole the advent calendar?

He got 25 days!

3. How does Christmas Day end?

With a 'y'!

4. What is the best Christmas present in the world?

A broken drum- you just can't beat it!

5. What do you get when you eat Christmas decorations?

Tinsilitis!

6. What is the worst disease you can get at Christmas?

Eczemas!

7. What's green, covered in tinsel, and goes "ribbet ribbet"?

A mistle-toad!

8. Why are Christmas trees such bad knitters?

They're always losing their needles!

9. What's the name of the horse mentioned in the song "Jingle Bells"?

Bob! (Bells on Bob's tail ring!)

10. Did you know that Santa's not allowed to go down chimneys this year?

It was declared unsafe by the Elf and Safety Commission.

11. What is Santa's favorite place to deliver Christmas presents?

Idaho-ho-ho!

12. What is claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus!

13. What kind of motorcycle does Santa drive?

A Holly Davidson!

14. Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet!

15. What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!

16. What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less!

17. What do cats and dogs call Santa Claus?

Santa Paws!

18. What do you call a cat sitting on a beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws!

19. What is Scrooge's favorite Christmas carol?

Silent Night!

20. What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The elfabet!

21. What kind of breakfast cereal does Frosty the Snowman eat?

Frosted Flakes!

22. What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas!

23. Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed!

24. What does the Christmas-hating sheep say?

Baaaaaaaa humbug!

25. What do you call a kid who doesn't believe in Santa?

A rebel without a Claus!

Subscribe to our Newsletter

"I want to thank Google, Wikipedia, and whoever else invented copy and paste. Thank you."

1. I'm so tired. I need a nap. Maybe I can sleep with my eyes open in class? Or pretend I'm not napping?

2. We have a test today? Why didn't anyone tell me? Did I know this?!

3. Can I quit school yet? It's only October, and I need a vacation.

4. The struggle is so real.

5. I'm so broke. SOS.

6. Stressed? Eat everything you own in your pantry and stuff your face with all your feelings.

7. "Did we have anything due in class today? Homework? Quiz? Test?" "Not that I know of..."

8. I need food. Where is the closest place to get food? I need it stat.

9. This is the longest day of my life. I need a drink, or two, or three.

10. Sleep? What is sleep? What a foreign concept.

11. When someone suggests going and studying in the library, let alone studying in general.

12. When the cafeteria or student center is packed and you can't find a seat anywhere so you literally have to sit in an abandoned corner.

13. When you see someone you used to hook up with. They see you, and approach you; so you have to pretend like everything is normal.

14. When you get your exam and realize you didn't study as much as you should have.

15. When you crush it on an exam or paper that you totally bullshitted.

16. I need a grande, extra strong coffee to get me through today.

17. When the professor announces you have a project due the following week with no instruction on what it's on and how to do it.

18. Is it Friday yet? Where's the weekend when you need it most?

19. It's freezing in here. I feel like I'm sitting in an igloo. I should have brought a jacket or worn long pants.

20. Did I remember my book? Damn, I forgot the book, and of course I need it for that quiz in class.

21. I would pay a million dollars to not go to class today; or actually never again.

22. I need a hoverboard to ride to class. Maybe then I wouldn't be running 15 minutes late to class every day.

23. Oh she/he's cute! I wonder if they're single. Who are they texting? They're BF/GF? I wonder if they think I'm cute. Could they be a potential new bae?

24. Why is there never any parking? I pay thousands of dollars a year for one parking spot to be open.

25. When it feels like you've been in class for an hour and you look at your phone and it has only been five minutes (I'm crying on the inside).

Subscribe to our
Newsletter