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Student Life

22 Questions I Have For Princeton University

I love you, orange bubble, but you confuse me.

Destiny Eisenhour

Jan 23, 2017

Princeton University

102

Bloomberg

You'd think that after a semester of Princeton, I'd know just about everything, right? Wrong. I love the place, but it's so darn confusing sometimes. Here are some perpetual unanswered questions that we all have for the Orange Bubble:

1. Why are finals AFTER break?

2. Will I ever be able to log in on TigerHub on the first try?

3. Why is there no late meal on Fridays?

4. Why do you skip Wilson on the campus tour?

5. @McCosh: Why? Enough said.

6. Why do I always get lost in McCosh Hall?

7. Why are there two McCoshes?

8. Did you ever meet John Nash?

9. Why are the Friend Center and E-quad so freakin’ far?

10. Why does it seem like everyone and their mother goes to Wilcox for lunch?

11. Can we get free stuff other than t-shirts?

12. Will the printer in J-Street ever work?

13. Why is Forbes Sunday Brunch so #worththewalk?

14. What does the YES! mean on the ground in Whitman?

15. Who are those cuties in orange plaid? (shoutout to the PUB!)

16. Will I really not graduate on time if I walk through the wrong gate?

17. Do people do the Prospect 12 and live to tell the tale?

18. Was this school made to be a calf workout? Why are there so many hills?

19. What’s up with these squirrels?

20. Will I ever learn all of the acronyms and slang?

21. Why won’t Michelle Obama visit us?

22. Why is everything so hard?

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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22 Questions I Have For Princeton University

I love you, orange bubble, but you confuse me.

1. Why are finals AFTER break?

2. Will I ever be able to log in on TigerHub on the first try?

3. Why is there no late meal on Fridays?

4. Why do you skip Wilson on the campus tour?

5. @McCosh: Why? Enough said.

6. Why do I always get lost in McCosh Hall?

7. Why are there two McCoshes?

8. Did you ever meet John Nash?

9. Why are the Friend Center and E-quad so freakin’ far?

10. Why does it seem like everyone and their mother goes to Wilcox for lunch?

11. Can we get free stuff other than t-shirts?

12. Will the printer in J-Street ever work?

13. Why is Forbes Sunday Brunch so #worththewalk?

14. What does the YES! mean on the ground in Whitman?

15. Who are those cuties in orange plaid? (shoutout to the PUB!)

16. Will I really not graduate on time if I walk through the wrong gate?

17. Do people do the Prospect 12 and live to tell the tale?

18. Was this school made to be a calf workout? Why are there so many hills?

19. What’s up with these squirrels?

20. Will I ever learn all of the acronyms and slang?

21. Why won’t Michelle Obama visit us?

22. Why is everything so hard?

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Because have you ever had to endure grilling your foot on a George Foreman?

1. When he just wanted bacon from his George Foreman grill

2. When he had money (and Jan) issues

3. When he got upstaged at Phyllis' wedding

4. When he unintentionally saved Meredith from rabies

5. When he wore a "bisexual" suit

6. When he had to apologize to Jesus

7. When his GPS drove him into a lake

8. When he had to deal with Ryan as his boss

9. When he couldn't fulfill his most generous empty promise

10. When this happened

11. When he struggled with a X-Mas break up

12. When he had to defend his generosity

13. When he threw a classy Christmas party for Holly but she had a boyfriend

14. When he had to stand up to peer pressure

15. When Toby was "Toby-ish"

This isn't just for the single Pringles out there either, folks

Run Around Clanging Pots and Pans in Everyone's Face

Eat the Last Few Pigs in a Blanket

Pop Twelve White Grapes

Burn Something

Smash Things Against a Wall

Spontaneously Begin an Irish Jig

Call Your Mother

Throw a Coffee Table Out a Window

Sing "Auld Lang Syne" at the Top of Your Lungs

Do Some Squats

Swan Dive into a Nearly Freezing Body of Water

Take a Shot

Time to be merry and bright.

"First Noel" by Leslie Odom, Jr

"A Holly Jolly Christmas" by Burl Ives

"Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas" by Kelly Clarkson

"All I Want for Christmas Is You" by Mariah Carey

"Christmas (Baby Please Come Home" by Michael Buble

"Last Christmas" by Taylor Swift

"The Christmas Song" by Josh Groban

"White Christmas" by Idina Menzel

"O Holy Night" by David Archuleta

"Believe" by Josh Groban

"Les cloches du hameau" by Celine Dion

Or at least try to do.

1. I will wake up (sorta) on time for class.

2. I will look decent for class.

3. I will go to the gym more.

4. I will go to the library and study more.

5. I will meet new people.

For those long nights that turn into mornings when the struggle is real.

1. Walk in motivated and ready to rock

2. Disappointed you let it get this bad

3. Distracted: When a 10-Minute Break Becomes an Hour

4. When the Yearning for Sleep Sneaks Up

5. In the words of Lorelai Gilmore "Coffee, Coffee, Coffee"

Oh, so done.

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