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22 Thoughts We Have Before Our Morning Coffee

Life begins after our first sip of coffee.

Nicole Talbot

Dec 13, 2016

Community College of Rhode Island

383

22 Thoughts We Have Before Our Morning Coffee

skinnytimetea.com

So you know how humans are made of 60% water? Well on any given day my body is made of 60% coffee. Just kidding... it is more like 90% coffee. I have truly considered what it would be like to live with an IV drip of freshly brewed french vanilla coffee. Can someone make that happen for me? If you are anything like myself and half of the human population, you cannot function as a real person without at least one sip of coffee. Here are some thoughts we all have before that special magic touches our lips...

First Waking Up...

1. So when can I sneak back into bed for a nap?

2. If I lie here under the covers no one will find me.

3. I need to move my Keurig to my nightstand.

4. Why doesn't my dog know how to make me coffee yet?

5. Please don't make me get up, I don't deserve to get out of bed.

6. Adulting is not happening today.

7. If I get up in 10 more minutes that is plenty of time to get ready...right?

Getting Ready...

8. I have to choose between shower or coffee...coffee wins.

9. Pants are on backwards, I might just leave them that way.

10. Who is texting me at this un-holy hour???

11. If I stare at my coffee will it brew faster? I bet it will.

12. Sorry pup, you are not going outside until this coffee is in my belly. Hold it.

13. Everything you just said to me will have to be repeated after my coffee.

14. Seriously I am not listening to you.

15. WHY ARE YOU TRYING TO HAVE A CONVERSATION WITH ME RIGHT NOW?

After That First Sip...

16. Today is going to be great!

17. I love work, I love traffic, I love the person who cut me off, I love coffee!

18. I am going to climb Mount Everest today!

19. Just kidding, but maybe I will work out.

20. I am going to ace this class, well at least be conscious.

21. Life isn't so bad.

22. I am ready for my next cup please.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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22 Thoughts We Have Before Our Morning Coffee

Life begins after our first sip of coffee.

First Waking Up...

Getting Ready...

After That First Sip...

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I'm technically an adult, so I'm legally required to live a little, right?

1. Watch an R-rated Scary Movie in a Movie Theater

2. Buy a Lottery Ticket

3. Vote in an Election

4. Participate in a Run (or a Walk, Realistically) for Charity

5. Go on a Road Trip

6. Start a Savings Account

7. Get a Credit Card

8. Sign up for Spotify Premium

9. Go to a Club

10. Start a Meditation Routine

11. Go to a Yoga Class

12. Treat Myself to a Dinner for One

13. Volunteer for a Charity

14. Participate in a Research Study

15. Bake Something (That Ends Up Being Edible)

16. Go Skydiving

17. Be Called for Jury Duty

18. Figure Out What I Want to Do With my Life

The holiday classics that shaped my life

1."But what would happen if we all tried to be like Santa and learned to give as only he can give: of ourselves, our talents, our love and our hearts? Maybe we could all learn Santa's beautiful lesson and maybe there would finally be peace on Earth and good will toward men."

"Sometimes the most real things in the world are the things we can't see."

"If you won't use your heart, who cares if it gets broken? If you just keep it to yourself, maybe it'll be like my rollerblades. When you do decide to try it, it won't be any good. You should take a chance. Got nothing to lose."

"Remember, no man is a failure who has friends."

"Life is made up of meetings and partings. That is the way of it."

"If you look for it, I've got a sneaky feeling you'll find a that love actually is all around."

"Sometimes things look good on paper, but lose their luster when you see how it affects real folks. I guess a healthy bottom line doesn't mean much if to get it, you have to hurt the ones you depend on."

"'Maybe Christmas,' he thought, 'doesn't come from a store. Maybe Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.'"

"Faith is believing when common sense tells you not to."

"There's room for everyone on the nice list."

Hopefully they will make you laugh.

1. Why are towels considered dirty when you get out of the shower clean?

2. Who closes the bus door once the bus driver gets off?

3. Why is there a "d" in "fridge" but not in "refrigerator"?

4. If you drop soap on the floor is the floor clean or the soap dirty?

5. Is the "S" or the "C" silent in the word "scent"?

6. Does expecting the unexpected make the unexpected the expected?

7. Would Lightning McQueen buy car insurance or life insurance?

8. Who put the alphabet in alphabetical order?

9. What color are mirrors?

10. If 2 mind readers read each other's minds whose mind are they really reading?

11. Is there a synonym for "synonym"?

12. If your shirt isn't tucked into your pants, are your pants tucked into your shirt?

13. Why is it called "quick sand" if you sink slowly in it?

14. If I try to fail, but succeed, which one did I do?

15. If Cinderella's shoe fit perfectly, why did it fall off?

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