"In a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit." So goes the first line of one of J.R.R. Tolkien's beloved masterpieces. My summer reading has led me to revisit "The Hobbit," and as I read I can't help but think that Mr. Bilbo Baggins and I would get along splendidly, for we have many characteristics in common. In fact, I'm not entirely convinced that I'm not a hobbit myself.
Perhaps you are a hobbit too! You might be a hobbit if:
1. You're shorter than everyone else
You held out hope that you'd reach your growth spurt eventually, but it never came. That's okay; you fit into small spaces better, and you make up for it with your big personality.
2. You have an affinity for clothing
(Bonus points if you can recognize all your dwarf friends by the color of their hood!)
3. You don't have a beard
"Hobbits have no beards," Tolkien put it plainly. If you do have a beard, perhaps you are a dwarf instead.
4. You prefer to be barefoot
5. You are fond of second breakfast
What could be better than having the most important meal of the day twice?
6. You like to have dinner twice a day too
And you're especially grumpy when you're stranded in the forest and you don't get dinner at all.
7. You are scared by adventures
But you go on them anyway, either because you just can't resist or because a magical wizard in a tall hat forces you.
8. You disappear when stupid people come around
"There is littleness or no magic about them, except the ordinary everyday sort which helps them to disappear quietly and quickly when large stupid folk like you and me come blundering along..." There you have it: avoiding stupidity is magical. Thanks, Mr. Tolkien.
9. You can move with great stealth
10. You interrupt often
Bilbo, afraid of Thorin's talk of adventure, let out a shriek "like the whistle of an engine coming out of a tunnel", fell to the floor, and repeatedly yelled, "struck by lightning, struck by lightning!" And I thought I was dramatic.
11. You love all things comfort
Food; safety; pocket handkerchiefs; warmth...did I mention food?
12. You drink lots of tea
13. You have abnormally large, hairy feet
No? OK me neither, but I vote we just pass over this one and still pretend we're hobbits.
14. You live in a hole in a hillside
I wish.
15. You frequently regret leaving home
Home is safe. Home means comfort. Adventures happen when you leave home, and adventures are scary.
16. You move forward courageously
"'Go back?' he thought. 'No good at all! Go sideways? Impossible! Go forward? Only thing to do! On we go!'" Of course, moving forward is easier when you're carrying a magic ring.
17. You have an abundance of wisdom
Hobbits are known, according to Tolkien, for their wisdom and proverbial sayings. You might be a hobbit if you always know the right thing to say.
18. You're good at riddles
But are you good at riddles at the edge of a lake at the end of a deathly dark tunnel while being threatened to be eaten?
19. You are intensely loyal to your friends
Even when that means putting yourself in danger for their sake.
20. You are keenly observant
And it helps you find things, like lost rings and hidden doors in mountains.
21. You feel brave after killing a spider
22. You always come through for your friends
Through goblin tunnels and prison cells, barrel rides and dragon fights, you face your biggest fears and do your duty to help your long-bearded companions.
