21 Thoughts Your Barista Wishes They Could Say Out Loud | The Odyssey Online
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21 Thoughts Your Barista Wishes They Could Say Out Loud

We may steam your lattes with a smile on your face, but what are we actually thinking?

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21 Thoughts Your Barista Wishes They Could Say Out Loud
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Are you one of those customers that make baristas cringe? Or are you one of our favorites?

Here are the 21 coffee faux pas and thoughts that every barista wishes they could scream about on a daily basis.

1. It’s ESpresso. Not EXpresso.

2. Your caramel macchiato isn’t actually a macchiato.

And it doesn’t even have caramel in it. It’s just an upside-down vanilla latte with caramel drizzle.

3. Non-fat milk and two percent milk taste the same.

4. I guarantee that getting a venti mocha frappe with non-fat milk won’t make any difference to your health.

5. Whipped cream is barely any calories.

So again, you’re not really cutting much out.

6. Mocha = Chocolate.

If you get something with mocha, it’s going to taste like chocolate. Nothing can be changed about this. Sorry, but no, we cannot make a mocha latte without chocolate.

7. You ordered a venti frappe JUST for the sprinkles on top? And now you want a refund because we’re out of sprinkles?

Okay… because that’s logical.

8. It’s not our fault if we’re out of a syrup or ingredient.

I don’t need your sass.

9. It’s also not my fault that I work at a Barnes & Noble café that sells Starbucks.

We're not a Starbucks.You can yell at me all you want. That doesn’t change the fact that you’re standing in a Barnes & Noble with a sign that says “Barnes & Noble Café”. We can’t take you gift cards.

10. No, coffee and espresso are not the same thing.

11. Yes, I know I ask a lot of questions.

But I’ll get in trouble if I don’t, so please just smile and be patient.

12. Don’t be offended when I ask if you want room for cream in your coffee.

You want your coffee as black as your soul. I get it. But some people have taste buds.

13. I know you’re going to take the lid off anyway, but we still need to put it on.

It’s policy.

14. I know it’s expensive.

I don’t set the prices. I make the drinks.

15. No, I can’t put in extra espresso or pumps of syrup AFTER you’ve already paid.

And demanding that is just a jerk move.

16. If you’re a regular, I love you and appreciate your existence.

17. I know when you’re giving me a fake name.

We literally only need your name for the cup. I’m not trying to steal your identity. So stop looking at me like I just asked for your for SSN.

18. Staring at me while I’m making your drink won’t make me move faster.

19. If you’re not at a Starbucks, don’t use Starbucks lingo.

I've worked at another coffee shop before this one. It's really annoying.

20. I only have two hands, and I can’t mark cups for five orders at once. Slow down.

21. Please just be nice! It’s only coffee.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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