Having recently turned 21, I decided to compile a list of 21 pieces of advices, life lessons, and tips that I've learned to acknowledge and accept over the course of my life, and maybe it'll be helpful/amusing to you!
1. How you treat people will never be the same as how they treat you. Don't expect someone else's love to come in the same form as your own.
2. You shouldn't have to tell someone to care about you or pay attention to you. If they want to, they will. If not, all you can do is move on.
3. Don't talk about other people just for the sake of gossip. There's really no need to spend time talking about things that ultimately do not have a place in your life.
4. Don't let the feel of failure stunt your creativity. Nothing you write, paint, create etc. will be perfect or or exactly how you want it be, and that's okay. People connect to art because of its imperfections. Beauty and inspiration rarely come from perfection.
5. Don't settle. Try not to date someone solely out of convenience. If you don't really click, just accept it and move on. Forcing a relationship never ends well, and besides there are plenty of people out there much more worthy of your time and attention, no matter how hard that might be to believe at times.
6. Live in the moment. If you keep looking to the future for satisfaction, it will never come and nothing will ever be enough. Allow yourself to appreciate what you have now, rather than dream of a future that might never come.
7. Do not apologize for who you are. Whoever you are, whoever you love, whatever you believe, embrace it. As long as you are not negatively affecting other people, you have no reason to be embarrassed or ashamed of who you are. You are valid and loved and your identity is an important part of you that shouldn't be ignored, overlooked, or hidden just so narrow-minded people can feel more comfortable.
8. Ask for help when you need it. Needing help is not a sign of weakness, and it takes courage to admit that sometimes you can't do everything on your own.
9. Treat others with kindness and respect. There's already too much negativity in the world and in the country, so try your best to make other people feel welcome and respected.
10. Study and work hard, but don't put too much pressure on yourself. Grades are important, but they don't define who you are and they are certainly not an accurate measure of your intelligence.
11. You have the right to choose who you want to include in your life. And for whatever reason you may have, getting rid of toxic people does not make you selfish or a bad person. It happens. Not everyone you know will want what's best for you. You just have to decide whether or not their influence will negatively impact you and how important it is for them to stay involved in your life.
12. Educate yourself. Whether it comes to politics or cultural customs, don't let yourself remain ignorant. It's important to stay informed about what's going on in the world around you, regardless of how morbid the news can sometimes be.
13. Stay active and involved. Don't let life just happen to you. Voice your thoughts and opinions, work hard to achieve your goals, and do not sit idly by when others attempt to wreak havoc on your world. Fight, resist, and stay informed.
14. Not everything or everyone is permanent. Some people will come into your life and only stay for a little while, and others might make it to the very end. Not everything is meant to last, but that doesn't mean that it didn't mean anything or have any value.
15. Save your money. It's okay to splurge a little here and there, but it's important to have a decent amount tucked safely away. You never know when you might need it.
16. Don't base your worth off of the ridiculously unachievable standards of conventional beauty. Your weight, appearance, and superficial qualities do not define you and should not be a way to measure success. Success can come in various forms, but how you look should not be one of them.
17. Take care of yourself. Make sure you allow yourself to get enough rest, eat nutritious food, and keep your body moving. Self care is important for both your mental and physical health. Treating your body with love and respect will only help you in the end.
18. Some people will suck and be unpleasant and you won't be able to reason with them. They might insult you and try to invalidate you, but their so-called principles will only get them so far, and it's important to remember that who you are is worth fighting for.
19. Let go and relax. Allow yourself to set aside some time each week to de-stress and rejuvenate. You could catch up on your favorite shows, go to the gym, get a massage, have a few drinks (provided you're not an alcoholic), etc. just as long as you focus on yourself and give your body and mind time to recharge.
20. Take the time to consider other points of view. What some people have to say might range from uncomfortable to downright offensive, but attempting to see where they're coming from can better aid a dialogue that might end up changing their minds.
21. It's okay to be vulnerable and show emotion. It doesn't make you weak or pathetic, it just makes you human. Things will effect you, so there's no sense in pretending to tough and resistant to any feelings you might have.
