Oh, the sacred 21st birthday. It's the final milestone of your life where you can celebrate your oldest, youngest self. You celebrate the grand entrance into adulthood and the great 'bon voyage!' to adolescence. It's when you can finally retire Ole Reliable (your fake ID), order a glass (or two, or three or a bottle) of wine at dinner and can officially be taken seriously as the kickass adult your are. What's not to love?
If you know me at all—or should know one thing about me—you should know that I take my birthday very seriously, to my mother's and friends' prevail. So listen up friends and family, here's what I want for my 21st birthday:
1. A Drink
This one goes without saying.
2. That Cute New Sweater From Aritzia
No matter what age I turn, I will always want new clothes. No matter what day of the week it is, I will always want new clothes. Basically, new clothes all the time would be just fine.
3. One Hundred Billion Dollars
Utility bills! Electricity! Taxes! Rent! Student loans! A few billion dollars should make up for those. And besides, that mansion on the beach won't pay for itself, you know.
4. A Paid Summer Internship
If I could already know my summer plans, that would be great. If those plans were paid and in downtown Chicago, that would be even better.
5. An Uninterrupted Nap
Can you blame me? A snuggly, two hour nap without any vacuuming,
talking, "oh you're still sleeping?" noises in the background could
suffice as the perfect present for me.
6. Free Spotify Premium
Even that student discount can't pull through hard enough to not make my bank account dwindle every month.
7. To Not Be Asked, "So are you seeing anyone special?" Over The Holidays
Grandma, you'll be the first to know when this happens, I PROMISE.
8. A Professional Contour Kit
After all this time the contour has been the go-to makeup trend, I have yet to master it. Maybe it's because I use my friend's old palette that's not my skin tone at all, but that could be just me.
9. A 4.0 GPA
With finals just around the corner, this could come in clutch.
10. Gigi Hadid's Body and/or Life
11. Free Concert Tickets For Life
Shelling out $350 every year for Lollapalooza alone would make this gift the ultimate.
12. Perfect Brows
Tweezing, waxing, threading, no thank you!
13. A Year Round Tan
Without the whole orange skin thing or cancer part.
14. To Actually Like Kale And "Green Smoothies"
If only kale tasted like potato chips and a cucumber smoothie tasted like an Oreo milkshake.
15. The Ability To Lose Weight While Eating McDonald's, Chipotle, and Papa Johns...
I probably would've lost 20 pounds alone this semester.
16. Makeup That Never Runs
Even "waterproof" has its limits.
17. A Personal Chef
More so because I hate the act of cooking, but having someone force
feed me a salad and having food readily available would definitely
better my eating habits (See #15).
18. A King-Sized Bed
To be able to roll over and not hit a wall and spread out as far as I can go would be a *~dream~*
19. Perfect WiFi Connection Anywhere, Anytime
"Life, Liberty, Great Wifi Connection* and the Pursuit of Happiness."
20. Magically Have Perfect "Work Professional" Outfits Appear In My Closet
One day, I'll have a job where I'll need to wear pencil skirts, blazers and blouses. As of now, my wardrobe of sweatpants, ripped jeans and wedges won't cut it. Instead of going out and shopping for these professional outfits (and secretly buying a slinky dress to wear to the next date party) it would be oh so much better if the perfect work attire just appeared in my closet.
21. To Be Treated Like An Adult
Even though I know I'm on the very bottom of the adult food chain,
I'm still on the food chain. And I would like to be treated as such.
