Being 21 (or in your twenties in general) in 2016 and wanting something real is heart-breaking. We now live in a society where it’s somewhat frowned upon to be this age and “tied down.” Well, guess what? I’m 21, I want an honest and loving relationship, and I’m not ashamed of it.
Yes, six months ago, I got out of a six-year relationship. Does this mean I shouldn’t search for something real? Absolutely not. Who is society to decide when it's acceptable to date again? Who is society to decide what age is appropriate for me to “settle down?” Who is society to tell me how I should spend my “golden years?”
I am beyond sick of hearing, “Slow down, just have fun for now,” or, “You’re too young to be tied down,” or my favorite, “You don’t need a man to be happy.” You are exactly right, society, I don’t need a man to be happy. I’m perfectly capable of having fun with my girls, but I want a man, I want to be “tied down,” and I want to enjoy my golden years with the man I’m committed to.
If I’m interested in a guy, I don’t want to be one of multiple girls he is entertaining. I know we live in a world full of options where it is so damn easy to just trade something in or upgrade it when you see the next best thing, but that’s not how dating should work. How can you genuinely get to know someone when you’re getting to know a handful of other people too? You can’t and honestly, you’re just going to exhaust yourself trying to keep up with them all, especially when they all want your undivided attention.
I want to be with a guy who I can completely trust to go out with his boys and know that he isn’t hanging all over girls because I would want him to be able to trust me when I’m out with my girls. I want us to be able to go out together, dance, have fun, go home with each other, wake up, and make homemade waffles in the morning. I want to make memories with a guy during the best years of our lives. I want to stay home, curled up on the couch, watching movies with him. I want to go to the fair, haunted houses, and pumpkin patches; I want walks on the beach, random road trips, and adventures.
I want to be shown off, as I will proudly show off the guy I’m with. I want little things like good morning or goodnight texts. I want to be his #WCW. But mainly, I just want to know that he wants the world to know I’m his. I want to find the one. I want to introduce him to my family and I want to meet his. I want us to dream about our future together and actively work towards our dreams. I want to eventually get engaged, have a beautiful wedding, go on the honeymoon we’ve both always dreamt of, and buy a cute little starter house that will hold us over until we bring our first child into the world. I want a man who loves God and wants to go to church every Sunday. I want the perfect husband, beautiful life, and white picket fence.
I want him to be my strongest, most honest and loving support system, as I will be his. I’ll support his dreams and encourage him to chase them. I’ll be there at the end of a hard day to take his shoes off, rub his back, and cook him dinner. I’d never let him fall asleep or start his day questioning my love for him. I want to be more than enough for him and I want to be on his mind. I want a guy who wants to be all of those things for me too.
This is what I want. If that’s asking too much, then you aren't enough for me.