For everyone who has seen Parks and Recreation, I'm sure there were at least a few times when you connected with one of the characters on a spiritual level. April Ludgate, the show's emotionless, sassy office worker, has described my life on so many different occasions. Here's twenty of the most retweet-able April quotes.
1. "I want to tell people what to do, then send them far away from me."
2. "I wanted to make fun of stupid people while I got drunk. My two true passions."
3. "I like to do nothing with no one."
4. "I very maturely and straightforwardly left anonymous comments about her online."
5. "I don't want to do things. I want to not do things."
6. "I guess I kind of hate most things. But I never really seem to hate you."
7. "But then I remembered that alcohol existed. Thank you, alcohol."
8. "Time is money. Money is power. Power is pizza. Pizza is knowledge. Let's go."
9. "I can convince small children that I'm a witch."
10. "Can you photoshop your life with better decisions?"
11. "Oh, I'm sorry. I was too busy not wanting to talk to you."
12. "Is it weird that my feelings are hurt that no one has found any dirt on me? Hello! I drove a riding lawn mower through a Nordstrom."
13. "No, I didn't win, but at least I didn't make any new friendships."
14. "I love games that turn people against each other."
15. "That's gross. I love it."
16. "If you ever speak to me in Spanish, please use the formal 'usted'."
17. "Horizons are dumb. Never broaden your horizons."
18. "Deep down inside everyone is just faking it until they figure it out."
