You’ll read a lot of articles on dating, sex, relationship advice, true love and I suppose this falls perfectly into that category, but here are 20 things that define the difference between the average and the extraordinary relationships. Try not to settle for anything less than extraordinary.

1. The spark is real. No, your significant other won’t electrocute you or zap you with their finger, but the spark truly exists. There is something going on with the chemicals in your body or neurons firing between your brain and your heart that makes your heart beat faster while it’s honing in on your honey.

2. He will be happy to change his Facebook status. He will not treat you like a moped, like something that’s fun to ride around on but too embarrassing to show off to your friends; your true love will show you off like a prize they won at the fair.

3. His family will tell him he’d be stupid to let you go. And they’d be absolutely correct.

4. You can’t control any part of falling in love with him. You don’t have to convince yourself that you are in love, you don’t have to accept someone just because you want to be in love with them. You don’t have to pay for your boyfriend’s gas to drive to your house. You can’t talk yourself out of real love, you won’t be able to write them off, you won’t be able to live without them, you can’t deny what real and effortless love is. When your worlds are meant to collide, they collide. Even if your family holds a strategically planned surprise intervention about the “damage he will do to this family” or how “unsafe it is to marry a foreigner” or if “he has tattoos, he must be an addict” or how “you can’t replace your (abusive) ‘perfect’ (to them) ex-husband (or ex-boyfriend) with someone who doesn’t look like he’s going to be good for you.” You will not be able to prolong or delay the process as hard as you or anyone else try.

5. You won’t have to buy your own engagement rings or wedding bands. Your true love will do whatever they can to put a ring on it, and if they can’t afford it, the whole flaunting of bling thing can wait until he can afford it (but if he can’t you won’t care either). And you won’t need a huge obnoxious picture perfect wedding either, you will still be happy as a pig in shit or happier if you can marry him at the court house without witnesses, sans wedding party, formal clothing, fancy flowers, makeup and up-do. You will understand that the wedding is legally uniting your souls and it doesn’t need to cost money to show off in front of 200 of your friends and relatives and their plus ones. It is and always will be about you and him.

6. He won’t be able to take their eyes off of you. And your eyes will be glued to him too. You’ll catch him taking a thousand pictures of you, or begging for more goofy selfies or duck faces.

7. When you kiss it will feel like the world around you falls away and it is just the two of you in your own fantastical world. You could be making out in Times Square and the buzz of the city life will fade out and stand still. You won’t want to stop kissing him. Your reality will finally be better than your dreams.

8. You won’t need to think about comebacks or mean things to say. You won’t need to defend yourself physically or emotionally from random attacks. You won’t be skittish around your true love, he will be your source of calmness. He will be your muse. He will be your hero. Nothing you do is ever a reason for someone to be physically or emotionally abusive toward you. Nothing. Do not tolerate shit like that. Ever. Leave immediately and don’t ever look back. No one like that can truly change.

9. Making love will be perfect. You won’t feel awkward or pressured into doing uncomfortable things, it will be natural and satisfying. It will be like you just solved life’s biggest puzzle with your bodies, if you’re meant to be together it will all make sense why you are both made the way you are.

10. You’ll laugh together constantly. He’ll make you laugh until you snort like a pig. You’ll make him laugh so hard he’ll choke on his drink. Laughing will make you feel so comfortable together.

11. You can trust them with your life. I don’t mean this lightly either. You can be assured that you will have someone to experience all of your ups and downs with, someone to carry you when you fall, someone to hold you as you mourn, someone to understand your highs and lows. Your secrets become each other’s, when someone confides in you, your lover is your confidant and your source of logic when you can’t form your own thoughts. You’ll experience births and deaths of people around you, and you’ll pray that you can spend as long as possible with this man by your side, and you’ll also hope that when you’re both old and gray and he’s on his way out you’ll hope that you go first so you won’t ever have to experience that heartache.

12. Their smile will be your sunrise and sunset. Their happiness will fuel you. The way he makes you feel will ignite your love of life and the world around you. You will see the beauty of this world when your heart is overflowing with love.

13. When you argue about anything you feel so bad about arguing that the argument will not last overnight. You’ll realize that whatever you argue about is not as important as the sanctity of your relationship so you’ll resolve it and move on. And you’ll feel bad that it ever happened in the first place. You’ll be happy to fall asleep with everything resolved.

14. You won’t hold grudges because with the right partner you discuss what is bothering you and when its done its done. Forever.

15. Your dreams will be just as valid as his and then you’ll come up with your dreams together. You’ll be supportive of his career, his hobbies, his friends. He’ll be equally as supportive. You’ll develop common friends.

16. You sacrifice some of your wants to satisfy your man and vice versa, it really is a give and take. You share responsibilities and own up to your mistakes. And sacrifices don’t feel like sacrifices because whatever you give up for him you gain much more satisfaction seeing him happy.

17. Someone who loves you will apologize but should expect that you will do the same. A woman is not always right as popular opinion states. Own that shit and then dissolve it.

18. Every other person on this planet will no longer fall into your “type” of people you are attracted to, even if he had an identical twin, you will only be in love with his looks, humor, mood swings, smile, habits, weird quirky things that used to annoy you just add to why you love him, you’ll love his smell, his body, his heart, his family, his goals, his career, his hair, his hands, his effort, and you’ll love his love for you. You won’t need to feel self-conscious that your body isn’t society’s standard of attractive or perfect because he will in his own way will make you feel like you are the most beautiful or cutest thing that has ever strutted their stuff in front of him. If you are ashamed of what you see in the mirror, be rest assured that with the one you are meant to be with that mirror or that scale or those pants you don’t fit in anymore will miss you more than you miss them.

19. I know everyone has heard this before and I never believed any word of it before I met my husband, but you will find out more about yourself with the one you are meant to be with than you did in all of the years you spent looking for yourself… You will make each other better, you will not recognize the person you were before, and you won't care to look back.

20. Most importantly, if your significant other practices faith, you will discover how deep a relationship can be if you center your heart and focus on God first. If you aren’t a believer, I’m not saying you won’t find a meaningful relationship, because I have friends that are madly in love with each other and all of the above applies to them too, but if you have the promise of eternity with someone who vows to serve God with all of his heart, then you will be well taken care of.