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20 Things That Lasted Longer Than Brock Turner's Prison Sentence

You'd be surprised how many things last longer than a rapist's sentence

Laurel Anne

Sep 13, 2016

Kappa Alpha Theta

20 Things That Lasted Longer Than Brock Turner's Prison Sentence

Sporting News

As I hope you are all aware, Brock Turner has recently been released from prison. After being sentenced a measly 6 months in federal prison for rape; Brock Turner was released for "good behavior" after only serving 3 months. To give you all a little perspective, here are 20 things that last longer than Turner's prison sentence:

1. Summer vacation

2. Figuring out how to properly put together IKEA furniture

3. Growing out bangs

4. Christmas decorations available for purchase

5. Breaking in a new pair of shoes

6. Teaching your grandparents anything about technology

7. Finding the missing Lego piece under the couch

8. A Bathroom Renovation

9. A boy to tell you how he feels about you

10. A box of tampons

11. The warranty on my phone

12. Most Leases

13. Fine Cheeses

14. A middle school relationship

15. Your toothbrush

16. Taylor Swift's relationships

17. Being approved to adopt

18. Traveling to the West by covered wagon

19. For Fudge to realize Voldemort was really back

20. The average rapist sentencing

According to the Bureau of Justice Statistics, the average sentencing for rapists is 9.75 years. It is amazing to me that in this day and age the serverity of a heinous crome such as rape can be held with such little regard. It's the 21st century, the world should not be a place where rapists do not fear retribution. Until the punishment actually fits the crime, how can we call it justice?

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12 Midnight NYE: Fun Ideas!

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1. I will wake up (sorta) on time for class.

Let's face it, last semester you woke up with enough time to brush your teeth and get to class and even then you were about 10 minutes late and rollin' in with some pretty unfortunate bed head. This semester we will set our alarms, wake up with time to get ready, and get to class on time!

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And so it begins.

1. Walk in motivated and ready to rock

Camping out at the library is not for the faint of heart. You need to go in as a warrior. You usually have brought supplies (laptop, chargers, and textbooks) and sustenance (water, snacks, and blanket/sweatpants) since the battle will be for an undetermined length of time. Perhaps it is one assignment or perhaps it's four. You are motivated and prepared; you don’t doubt the assignment(s) will take time, but you know it couldn’t be that long.

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You need sleep, but also have 13 things due in the span of 4 days.

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Recommended for you

20 Things That Lasted Longer Than Brock Turner's Prison Sentence

You'd be surprised how many things last longer than a rapist's sentence

1. Summer vacation

2. Figuring out how to properly put together IKEA furniture

3. Growing out bangs

4. Christmas decorations available for purchase

5. Breaking in a new pair of shoes

6. Teaching your grandparents anything about technology

7. Finding the missing Lego piece under the couch

8. A Bathroom Renovation

9. A boy to tell you how he feels about you

10. A box of tampons

11. The warranty on my phone

12. Most Leases

13. Fine Cheeses

14. A middle school relationship

15. Your toothbrush

16. Taylor Swift's relationships

17. Being approved to adopt

18. Traveling to the West by covered wagon

19. For Fudge to realize Voldemort was really back

20. The average rapist sentencing

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This isn't just for the single Pringles out there either, folks

Run Around Clanging Pots and Pans in Everyone's Face

Eat the Last Few Pigs in a Blanket

Pop Twelve White Grapes

Burn Something

Smash Things Against a Wall

Spontaneously Begin an Irish Jig

Call Your Mother

Throw a Coffee Table Out a Window

Sing "Auld Lang Syne" at the Top of Your Lungs

Do Some Squats

Swan Dive into a Nearly Freezing Body of Water

Take a Shot

Time to be merry and bright.

"First Noel" by Leslie Odom, Jr

"A Holly Jolly Christmas" by Burl Ives

"Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas" by Kelly Clarkson

"All I Want for Christmas Is You" by Mariah Carey

"Christmas (Baby Please Come Home" by Michael Buble

"Last Christmas" by Taylor Swift

"The Christmas Song" by Josh Groban

"White Christmas" by Idina Menzel

"O Holy Night" by David Archuleta

"Believe" by Josh Groban

"Les cloches du hameau" by Celine Dion

Or at least try to do.

1. I will wake up (sorta) on time for class.

2. I will look decent for class.

3. I will go to the gym more.

4. I will go to the library and study more.

5. I will meet new people.

For those long nights that turn into mornings when the struggle is real.

1. Walk in motivated and ready to rock

2. Disappointed you let it get this bad

3. Distracted: When a 10-Minute Break Becomes an Hour

4. When the Yearning for Sleep Sneaks Up

5. In the words of Lorelai Gilmore "Coffee, Coffee, Coffee"

Oh, so done.

You need sleep, but also have 13 things due in the span of 4 days.

1. When it's December 1 and you have seven things due, three exams, and haven't slept in three days.

2. So you stress.

3. And cry.

4. Then call your mom to cry some more.

5. After the pep talk, you feel determined to get everything done.

6. But, now you're tired.

7. And really hungry.

8. Suddenly, it's 2 a.m. and you have only written three sentences and your paper is due in the morning.

9. You've made it to Friday... somehow.

10. Then Sunday hits and you find yourself back at the Lib.

11. So you cry some more.

12. But, you fight through the tears to get everything done because you're determined.

13. In the end, you feel on top of the world because you made it through the last week of class alive.

14. But, now it's finals week so good luck.

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