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20 Things Single People Say on Valentine's Day

We're just here for the chocolate.

Payton Leigh Taylor

Feb 13, 2017

University of New Hampshire

107

20 Things Single People Say on Valentine's Day

1. Today’s going to be a good day.

2. Oh no, it’s Valentine’s Day.

3. It’s 10am, why are there already so many cringy Instagram pictures?

4. I don’t need a man, I have my mom. My mom loves me.

5. I can buy myself candy and flowers, I can be an independent woman.

6. Why would you even want a boyfriend so young? Life is so fun without one!

7. *Sees a couple holding hands* I want a boyfriend.

8. Those huge teddy bears are so impractical, what do you even do with it after today?

9. Ugh, I want someone to like me enough to buy me a big teddy bear.

10. My bed will be my date tonight.

11. I didn’t have to shave my legs today, so who is the real winner?

12. Do half of these couples realize they’ll be broken up by next Valentine’s Day?

13. You’ve been together two weeks, stop talking about how much you love each other.

14. For the love of GOD please keep the pet names off of where I can see them.

15. Valentine’s Day is all commerical now anyways, it’s not even about love anymore.

16. OH MY GOD look what (insert friend’s name here)’s boyfriend got her! I wish someone would buy that for me.

17. Flowers die anyways, why would I want that.

18. Flowers are so pretty.

19. Maybe I’ll just apply to be on The Bachelor.

20. I can’t wait until candy is 50% off tomorrow.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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20 Things Single People Say on Valentine's Day

We're just here for the chocolate.

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This isn't just for the single Pringles out there either, folks

Run Around Clanging Pots and Pans in Everyone's Face

Eat the Last Few Pigs in a Blanket

Pop Twelve White Grapes

Burn Something

Smash Things Against a Wall

Spontaneously Begin an Irish Jig

Call Your Mother

Throw a Coffee Table Out a Window

Sing "Auld Lang Syne" at the Top of Your Lungs

Do Some Squats

Swan Dive into a Nearly Freezing Body of Water

Take a Shot

Time to be merry and bright.

"First Noel" by Leslie Odom, Jr

"A Holly Jolly Christmas" by Burl Ives

"Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas" by Kelly Clarkson

"All I Want for Christmas Is You" by Mariah Carey

"Christmas (Baby Please Come Home" by Michael Buble

"Last Christmas" by Taylor Swift

"The Christmas Song" by Josh Groban

"White Christmas" by Idina Menzel

"O Holy Night" by David Archuleta

"Believe" by Josh Groban

"Les cloches du hameau" by Celine Dion

Or at least try to do.

1. I will wake up (sorta) on time for class.

2. I will look decent for class.

3. I will go to the gym more.

4. I will go to the library and study more.

5. I will meet new people.

For those long nights that turn into mornings when the struggle is real.

1. Walk in motivated and ready to rock

2. Disappointed you let it get this bad

3. Distracted: When a 10-Minute Break Becomes an Hour

4. When the Yearning for Sleep Sneaks Up

5. In the words of Lorelai Gilmore "Coffee, Coffee, Coffee"

Oh, so done.

You need sleep, but also have 13 things due in the span of 4 days.

1. When it's December 1 and you have seven things due, three exams, and haven't slept in three days.

2. So you stress.

3. And cry.

4. Then call your mom to cry some more.

5. After the pep talk, you feel determined to get everything done.

6. But, now you're tired.

7. And really hungry.

8. Suddenly, it's 2 a.m. and you have only written three sentences and your paper is due in the morning.

9. You've made it to Friday... somehow.

10. Then Sunday hits and you find yourself back at the Lib.

11. So you cry some more.

12. But, you fight through the tears to get everything done because you're determined.

13. In the end, you feel on top of the world because you made it through the last week of class alive.

14. But, now it's finals week so good luck.

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