From your point of view as the customer, I know that all you can see is that long line ahead of you with only two associates on the register. What you don’t see, however, is the team of associates working long hours on their feet all day, forcing a smile to give each and every customer in the store their best service. We wish just as much as you that we could be in two places at once. We wish we could check a clearance price for you and find another size in the back for another at the same time. While we have two people on the cash register helping the line of customers ready to pay for their new clothes, we have a handful of customers in the dressing room getting advice from our experts and stylists on their new looks for their dinner date tonight. We also have managers who are running around making sure all of the sizes you may need are in presentation for you, coaching associates to give the best customer service possible, and making sure the store is meeting it’s sales goals for the day.

From our point of view as associates, here are some things we hear all too often.

1. "I just want to check the price."

*Puts 10 items on register. Buys none of them.*

2. "Can I speak to your manager?"

Chances are my manager will give you the same answer I did. Who do you think trained me?

3. "I'm buying this for my aunt's best friend's daughter's boyfriend for his birthday. Do you think he will like it?"

4. "I could buy this same shirt at for $5 at Walmart."

Please. Tell me again.

5. "I'm never coming back here!"

I'll miss you. Not.

6. "Can you give me a coupon?"

No. Just no.

7. "I didn't want to mess up your nice pile."

So the whole stack is on the floor because...?

8. "Excuse me, do you work here?"

You just saw me take my name tag off. I just clocked out, so at the moment, no.

9. "No, I don't want the rewards card for free coupons. I never shop here."

You're here. Right now.

10. "You think I'm stealing because of my race."

No, we think you're stealing because you're stealing.

11. "Are you flirting with me?"

No. But if it'll make you buy more things, than sure.

12. "Do you close at 9:30?"

Yes, and just because it's 9:28 doesn't mean you should start shopping now.

13. "How much is this?"

*Silently points to the price tag.*

14. "How's your day so far?"

Good. Great. Wonderful.

15. "Can I have your discount?"

How about no.

16. "The customer is always right!"

17. "There's no tag. Is it free?"

Please tell me you did not ask me that question.

18. "There was no one in the fitting rooms so we climbed under the door."

Oh.

19. "Do these jeans make my butt look big?"

Please don't make me look.

20. "The person wearing pants told me this was on sale."

Please specify. Or no. No they did not.