1. You're AED certified (which sounds cool, but they're actually idiot proof)
2. You yell "WALK" more than anything else while on duty
3. Your knees are the tannest part of your body
4. That smile you have when you check the radar and it calls for rain ALL DAY
5. You're tempted to just tell patrons "no" when they ask if you'll save them
6. Sunscreen is your natural scent after about a week
7. 'Body on the bottom' training is a necessary evil
8. The mini heart attack you have when toddlers are messing around the stairs unsupervised
9. Go to the pool for fun and your work suit and casual suit lines make you look like Neapolitan ice cream (you're neapoliTAN...)
10. That feeling when it's not raining hard enough and kids decide to keep swimming so you have to stay on the stand (while the parents find cover)
11. High school chemistry actually helped prepare you for checking pool chemicals
13. The awkward moment when you drop your whistle and have to ask a patron to pick it up
14. You know the names of every troublemaker, but they just know you as "the lifeguard"
15. The mini heart attack you have whenever someone dives into the pool
16. A swimsuit and sunglasses is actually considered a uniform
17. Ice cold water at the end of a rotation gives you life
18. The fear running through your veins when your boss just comes and stands next to you when you're in the chair
19. Going a whole shift without getting wet or splashed is a miracle
20. The irritation you feel when a kid looks straight at you right before doing something they're not supposed to
