OK, so I’m technically not 20 yet. But considering I turn 20 in another two or so weeks (I’m getting old!), I figured I could still write about 20 things I’ve learned so far. 20 years of life on earth may not be a whole lot of experience, but I think it’s fair to say I’ve picked up on a few things here and there!

1. People talk.

This can be a good or a bad thing; sometimes people say good things about you and build you and your dreams up, and other times people speak negatively about you. At the end of the day, they’re entitled to their opinion and only you can truly know who you are and where your heart’s at; people speaking poorly of you says more about them than it does about you.

2. You become who you hang out with.

I’d rather surround myself with visionaries, encouragers, optimists and go-getters, because the Negative Nellies will only drag you down. Stay friends with them and try to be a light, but make sure the bulk of your time is spent with those who call you higher. Iron sharpens iron.

3. Strong people didn’t become strong on accident.

Strong people usually went through some sort of hell. The difference between them and the victim is that the strong person decided that they would define their circumstances instead of letting their circumstances define them.

4. People who make you think that you’re hard to love are usually the ones who need love the most.

Hurt people hurt people. So the ones who wound you the deepest are usually the ones hurting the deepest; they are the ones who actually need love the most.

5. If you buy someone’s opinion, you also buy their lifestyle.

Their opinion isn’t your reality. Their opinion doesn’t pay your bills. Their opinion doesn’t change your calling. So make sure that you’re taking advice from people whose advice is making you better and stronger, instead of listening to the “advice” of those who find something negative to say about everyone and everything.

6. Genuine and good relationships are worth the wait.

I chose to not date for the first 19 years of my life only because I didn’t want the distraction, even though sometimes that decision was hard. Then God recently opened the door for the relationship I’m in now… and he was worth the wait. Wait for relationships and friendships that God orchestrates instead of settling because you’re lonely. It’s worth it.

7. We’re all the same deep down.

No matter how we look on the outside, what we do or what we dream about, we’re all human. We all desire to have fulfilling relationships, to go see new things, and to live for something bigger than ourselves. We really aren’t that different deep down

8. Life doesn’t usually go according to plan.

By all means, plan and shoot for goals. But find the balance between planning and going with the flow, because life usually doesn’t go according to plan.

9. The small things are the big things.

The small gifts in each day become the big things over time. A kind word from a loved one, the smell of flowers, laughter, afternoons swinging with friends. None of this is monumental; but these small moments often mean the most and should be soaked in and appreciated.

10. Traveling does the soul good.

Seeing new places and trying new things and meeting new people expands your vision and deepens your perspective. It does your soul good and helps you realize that there’s a whole lot more to this life than your little town and daily routine.

11. Eat some cake, or a burger.

Not every day of course. But treat yo’ self now and then, you deserve it. And life’s too short to always eat salads.

12. You can always make more money, but you can never create more time.

Money comes and goes and then comes again; time comes once and then it’s gone forever. So really, which is more valuable?

13. Your identity is found in Christ alone, not in what anyone else says or thinks of you.

An identity built on other’s opinions will crumble, but an identity build on who Christ says you are cannot be shaken. You’re a son or daughter of the King- nothing can take that from you.

14. Time heals all wounds.

It might take a lot of time. A lot longer than you originally thought. But you will heal. Even if it leaves a battle scar, you will heal.

15. Learning to laugh at yourself is key.

I screw up on the daily. I’m a total klutz most of the time and embarrass myself more than I’d like to admit… and that would really suck if I couldn’t laugh at myself and my shenanigans. Laugh at your humanity and know you aren’t alone.

16. Genuine beauty isn’t surface deep.

The most beautiful people are the ones who see the beauty in others, the ones who love deeply when loving is hard. They are the ones who are unashamedly themselves, who serve others before themselves, who are confident and humble at once. True beauty is in the heart, not the skin.

17. Most victories aren’t won all at once; they are won one day at a time.

Star athletes pour hour after unseen hour into their sport and that’s why they are great. Musicians practice day after day, and that’s why they’re brilliant. Spiritually strong people pursue their relationship with Christ day by day, and that’s why they’re strong. Greatness is the result of our daily choices

18. It’s OK to cry.

I didn’t used to cry a whole lot; I still don’t cry often, but I don’t feel weak for crying anymore. Sometimes it’s just the release you need to pick yourself up and keep going.

19. What you focus on is what expands.

Focus on the blessings, the things you’re grateful for, and the joys of each day, and you’ll start to notice more and more of those things. Focus on the one thing going wrong and suddenly you’ll notice other things going wrong. Some people look at the night sky and see nothing but darkness; others see the millions of stars and smile at the beauty of life. It’s all about perspective.

20. God’s faithfulness is the only thing that will never fail.

People disappoint, we fail, and life crumbles. But the Lord is a rock, the only true foundation, and the only one who will never change, never leave, and never disappoint. He is faithful till the end, and He is worth it.

(Almost) 20 years of life, and 20 lessons learned. There’s a whole lot more learned than this, but these are a few of the standouts. It’s a beautiful life, friends. Cheers to the first 20, and here’s to the next 20!