Over the first two decades of my life there has already been many ups and downs. Some days have felt like the best day ever while others felt like the worst. Looking back on my past self, I have realized how much I have learned and how much I have grown. I have learned countless lessons, but here are 20 of them!
1. Love yourself
I'm sure that this is something you have heard many many many times and will hear many more. Seriously though, in order to thrive in other relationships whether that be with a significant other, family, or friends, you gotta love yourself first. If you don't know how to love yourself, then how are you going to love others? We are our own worst critics so I know how easy it is to compare yourself to others. Simply loving yourself can change your life. It is so powerful.
2. Do what you want
Obviously this statement has some perimeters to it as we still have to ask for parents' permission as we grow up, but my main point is to do what you want without worrying about the opinions of others. Don't let an opinion stop you from what YOU want to do.
3. Know your worth and set your standards high
Set your standards high, know what you deserve, and how you deserve to be treated. Do not settle for anything less. Reach for what you want. If you settle, there is a chance that you may find yourself not as happy as you could be. Now do be open and do not completely block yourself off just because one thing is not the way you want it. Give it a chance, but never settle whether that be in a career, with a person, or really anything else. Higher vibes = higher life
4. Cut out toxic when you see it
Learn who is good for you and who isn't. Surround yourself with those who support you, are there for you, care about you, love you, make time for you, and the list could go on. Toxic can weigh you down and make you feel like you are not good enough. Letting go is hard, but losing yourself while trying to hold on to someone else is even harder and quite frankly, not worth it.
5. Learn how to say no
Saying "no" is definitely something that we all tend to struggle with. It is hard to do because of the fear that someone's opinion of you will change or you don't wanna disappoint them. However, if it is something that you do not feel comfortable with then it is totally okay to say "no". That person that you said "no" to will eventually get over it. You are not the bad guy for saying "no".
6. Never give up on what you want
Work for what you want. Reach for the stars. Achieve your goals. Your only limit is YOU. Nothing worth having will ever be easy so you will have to put the effort in. Do what is going to make you happy even if it is a little difficult. Your future self will thank you.
7. Learn when enough is enough
Okay, so this one kinda goes along with the last one and number five. I am a firm believer in not giving up even when life gets a little sticky. However, sometimes you gotta know when something is not worth fighting for anymore. Sometimes, you have to stop tearing yourself up over something so small in this big world we live in. Stand up for yourself because you sure as heck are not a doormat.
8. Explore new opportunities
We live in a world where the opportunities are endless. There are so many options to choose from it can leave our heads spinning on which to choose or what way is the right way. Explore many options, you do not have to stick with only one path. For example, my major is elementary education so I tend to stick with the option of jobs that involve kids, but this summer I am working in a marketing and sales job. I think it is really important to try some different jobs to build up the resume, strengthen skills, and just learn more about what other businesses do. Now, this does not only apply to only jobs, it can also apply in many other aspects of life. Don't be afraid to step out of your comfort zone and try something new.
9. Remember to put yourself first
This one is super important because we tend to get so wrapped up in attending to others needs before helping ourselves at least I know I do. We are always taught not be selfish, but ya know sometimes you have to be. Sometimes you have to be your own biggest cheerleader. You have to do what is best for you and what will benefit you the most.
10. Don't be so hard on yourself
We make mistakes, we are all human. It's inevitable. What is important is how we process our mistakes and how we use these mistakes to learn. I tend to overthink past mistakes or decisions and suddenly am too hard on myself. These things do not define us, so don't let it get to you too much.
11. It's okay to try and fail, but do not fail to try
Failure is going to happen. You really can't avoid it. What's worse than failure though is not even trying. You never know what will happen unless you try. So, whatever it is, step out on a limb and give it a shot. You may regret it if you don't.
12. Family is forever, so show them some extra love
Family has always been a huge part of my life. They are so loving and so supportive of everything that I do. As I have gone off to college and become more independent, I have realized the importance of family time and reminding them how amazing they truly are. They are my people and will forever be my people. Soak in as much time as you can with your fam because you will appreciate it just as much as they do.
13. Realize that not everyone who walks into your life is meant to stay
This might be one of the hardest pills to swallow. It's rough when people enter your life and you grow so close then one day that all changes. God does this for a reason. Some people come into our lives to be a blessing but they are temporary. The lesson that we learn from that is one that we can carry with us.
14. Focus on the positive
Nobody likes a negative Nelly, so focus on what is going well in your life! Make a gratitude list of everything that you have to be grateful for. Whenever you are positive, you will attract a new crowd. You will realize who you want to spend your time with and how you want to spend your time. Positivity is contagious!
15. Grow up but at the same time, don't grow up
Yes, we all get older and mature which should and will happen, but stay young at heart. Kids are always so curious and asking questions. As we get older, we should still do these things to learn. Joke around, laugh, be playful. Getting older does not mean you have to be serious all the time. Basically, remember to embrace your inner child.
16. Love like Jesus
We come across many people every day whether that be ones we know or ones we don't know. Whoever they are, always be kind, be gentle, and show love. Be a light to those around you and be the reason why someone smiles. We are called to love our neighbors. We can easily show love just by how we treat them or how we help them.
17. Travel and go on adventures
This world is way too big to stay in the same place all the time! Get out and explore new places that you have never been to before. There are so many beautiful places in this world, so travel while you are able to. Traveling can open your eyes. You will learn more about the world and yourself through the places you go to. Immerse yourself in new experiences, you won't regret it.
18. Take time to find yourself
As a 20 year old, I feel like I am continuously rediscovering myself. That's what early adulthood is for, right? I have become more and more independent and this independence has truly shown me who I am and who I want to be. I am still working on finding myself and my purpose in the world, but I know that it will continue to be revealed to be as I continue to grow. So, really take time to find yourself. Find who you are without anyone else around. Take time to discover who you are and who you want to be.
19. Grow through what you go through
Every situation that you may go through is an opportunity to grow. It is an opportunity to take what happened and learn from that so that you can react to the situation differently if it ever happens again. Growth is constantly happening so take advantage of it and prosper!
20. No matter how crazy life gets, remember God is SO GOOD all the time
Had to save the best one for last! Life is so crazy! We will go through a roller coaster full of ups and downs, but God is constant. He is for YOU and he has a plan for YOU. Just gotta trust the process!
