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20 Halloween Puns to Light Up Your Spooky Season

It's Time to Creep It Real

Anshruta Dhanashekar

Apr 30, 2019

Emory University

879

20 Halloween Puns to Light Up Your Spooky Season

https://www.simplemost.com/candy-corn-surprise-cake-halloween-recipe/

After coming to college, I realized how Halloween, especially this year, was so meaningful and driven by memes, social media posts, and similar costumes. Halloween is not necessarily about trick-or-treating anymore, but instead, it is about posting pictures, making door decorations and having fun to de-stress from midterms. Without further ado, here are some FANG-tastic puns, one-liners, and jokes to light up your spooky season.

"What kind of music do mummies listen to? They listen to WRAP music"

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"You're just my (blood) type"

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"I would make a skeleton joke, but I don't find them HUMERUS"

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"Your costume is so realistic its unCANDY"

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"Oh my GOURD, I love Halloween"

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"What's a vampire's favorite flavor of ice-cream? VEIN-illa"

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"What's a monster's favorite play? Romeo and GHOUL-iet"

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"How do monsters know their futures? They read HORROR-scopes"

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"This Halloween, live on the FRIGHT-side"

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"A skeleton's favorite instrument is the trom-BONE"

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"Creep it real"

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"What do you call two witches living together? BROOM-mates"

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"What do birds give out on Halloween night? TWEETS"

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"Why didn't the ghost dance at the party? He had no-BODY to dance with"

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"Who do vampires buy their cookies from? The GHOUL scouts"

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"Give them PUMPKIN to talk about"

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"What do ghosts have for dessert? Ice SCREAM"

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"What is a skeleton's favorite fruit? A BONE-ana"

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"Why did the witches lose the baseball game? Their BATS flew away"

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"How did the pumpkin fix the hole in his pants? With a PUMPKIN PATCH"

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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20 Halloween Puns to Light Up Your Spooky Season

It's Time to Creep It Real

"What kind of music do mummies listen to? They listen to WRAP music"

"You're just my (blood) type"

"I would make a skeleton joke, but I don't find them HUMERUS"

"Your costume is so realistic its unCANDY"

"Oh my GOURD, I love Halloween"

"What's a vampire's favorite flavor of ice-cream? VEIN-illa"

"What's a monster's favorite play? Romeo and GHOUL-iet"

"How do monsters know their futures? They read HORROR-scopes"

"This Halloween, live on the FRIGHT-side"

"A skeleton's favorite instrument is the trom-BONE"

"Creep it real"

"What do you call two witches living together? BROOM-mates"

"What do birds give out on Halloween night? TWEETS"

"Why didn't the ghost dance at the party? He had no-BODY to dance with"

"Who do vampires buy their cookies from? The GHOUL scouts"

"Give them PUMPKIN to talk about"

"What do ghosts have for dessert? Ice SCREAM"

"What is a skeleton's favorite fruit? A BONE-ana"

"Why did the witches lose the baseball game? Their BATS flew away"

"How did the pumpkin fix the hole in his pants? With a PUMPKIN PATCH"

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"I want to thank Google, Wikipedia, and whoever else invented copy and paste. Thank you."

1. I'm so tired. I need a nap. Maybe I can sleep with my eyes open in class? Or pretend I'm not napping?

2. We have a test today? Why didn't anyone tell me? Did I know this?!

3. Can I quit school yet? It's only October, and I need a vacation.

4. The struggle is so real.

5. I'm so broke. SOS.

6. Stressed? Eat everything you own in your pantry and stuff your face with all your feelings.

7. "Did we have anything due in class today? Homework? Quiz? Test?" "Not that I know of..."

8. I need food. Where is the closest place to get food? I need it stat.

9. This is the longest day of my life. I need a drink, or two, or three.

10. Sleep? What is sleep? What a foreign concept.

11. When someone suggests going and studying in the library, let alone studying in general.

12. When the cafeteria or student center is packed and you can't find a seat anywhere so you literally have to sit in an abandoned corner.

13. When you see someone you used to hook up with. They see you, and approach you; so you have to pretend like everything is normal.

14. When you get your exam and realize you didn't study as much as you should have.

15. When you crush it on an exam or paper that you totally bullshitted.

16. I need a grande, extra strong coffee to get me through today.

17. When the professor announces you have a project due the following week with no instruction on what it's on and how to do it.

18. Is it Friday yet? Where's the weekend when you need it most?

19. It's freezing in here. I feel like I'm sitting in an igloo. I should have brought a jacket or worn long pants.

20. Did I remember my book? Damn, I forgot the book, and of course I need it for that quiz in class.

21. I would pay a million dollars to not go to class today; or actually never again.

22. I need a hoverboard to ride to class. Maybe then I wouldn't be running 15 minutes late to class every day.

23. Oh she/he's cute! I wonder if they're single. Who are they texting? They're BF/GF? I wonder if they think I'm cute. Could they be a potential new bae?

24. Why is there never any parking? I pay thousands of dollars a year for one parking spot to be open.

25. When it feels like you've been in class for an hour and you look at your phone and it has only been five minutes (I'm crying on the inside).

26. When the professor asks if there are any more questions at the end of class and someone raises their hand.

27. When you get assigned the most incompetent group of people possible for a group project.

28. I need a comfort dog so I can avoid all life and school responsibilities.

"A Christmas Story" is the star on top of the tree.

Who isn't stressing out over finals right now?

'tis the season to be jolly!

May the odds be ever in your favor.

Phase One: The “I got this” phase

Phase Two: The “I have time” phase

Phase Three: The uncontrollable sobbing phase

Phase Four: The “help me, I've fallen and I can't get up” phase

Phase Five: The rejoicing phase

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