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20 Bacon-Flavored Products That Shouldn't Exist

I thought Nutella stole bacon's thunder anyway.

Charles Lennon

May 23, 2016

Ohio Wesleyan University

686

20 Bacon-Flavored Products That Shouldn't Exist

jdffoods.net

Bacon is loved by all. That's a social stigma we're all expected to believe in and uphold. We do this by talking about bacon, advertising bacon endlessly, and incorporating it into our daily products to enhance the ever-growing signal-boosting image of bacon. Here are some solid examples of that being taken way too far.

1. Bacon Flavored Toothpaste

If I wanted to keep the awful taste of food in my mouth while I sleep I wouldn't even bother brushing my teeth. This product is redundant.

2. Bacon Flavored Floss

Point reiterated.

3. Bacon Flavored Baby Formula

Babies aren't even aware of the bacon stigma yet, leave them alone.

4. Bacon Scented Soap

Only for the manliest men with the manliest of superiority complexes that can only be curbed by bacon scented everything.

5. Bacon Flavored Popcorn

I wanna remember the movie not the barfing in the bathroom.

6. Bacon Flavored Salt

Goes great with my bitter saltiness about this matter.

7. Bacon Scented Sunscreen

For those out there who want to feel like an actual pig when they suntan. I'm only shaming it a little.

8. Bacon Flavored Crackers

No more, please.

9. Bacon Flavored Candy Canes

You can find this with the coal you earned this year.

10. Bacon Scented Deodorant

Five bucks to anyone who bites someone actually using this. Act confused.

11. Bacon Scented Laundry Detergent

For the frisky few who wanna get rid of the grease stain but keep the smell.

12. Bacon Scented Candles

Okay this idea is good-- b-but it's for men only. *aggressively checks masculinity*

13. Bacon Flavored Syrup

Both are seperate parts of a balanced breakfast.

14. Bacon Flavored Animal

Disassembling required.

15. Bacon Flavored Olive Oil

Did someone even consult bacon on this?

16. Bacon Coffin

Don't even think about talking to me unless you're getting buried in this.

17. Bacon Scented Mustache

Your fragile masculinity is showing... and it smells delicious. Go the extra mile by attaching an actual piece of bacon to your face.

18. Bacon Teether

THERE'S the conditioning I was referring to earlier. Never mind, grab the bacon baby formula.

19. Bacon Flavored Hot Sauce

That pig on the bottle is how I feel about this.

20. Bacon Flavored Mayonnaise

Someone cut the brakes.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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Recommended for you

20 Bacon-Flavored Products That Shouldn't Exist

I thought Nutella stole bacon's thunder anyway.

1. Bacon Flavored Toothpaste

2. Bacon Flavored Floss

3. Bacon Flavored Baby Formula

4. Bacon Scented Soap

5. Bacon Flavored Popcorn

6. Bacon Flavored Salt

7. Bacon Scented Sunscreen

8. Bacon Flavored Crackers

9. Bacon Flavored Candy Canes

10. Bacon Scented Deodorant

11. Bacon Scented Laundry Detergent

12. Bacon Scented Candles

13. Bacon Flavored Syrup

14. Bacon Flavored Animal

15. Bacon Flavored Olive Oil

16. Bacon Coffin

17. Bacon Scented Mustache

18. Bacon Teether

19. Bacon Flavored Hot Sauce

20. Bacon Flavored Mayonnaise

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1. The Family Traditions

2. Enough food for an actual army

3. Never enough space

4. Always Loud & Never Boring

5. Parties. Parties. Parties.

6. Scheduling

7. Travelling

8. The family members you see once a year

9. DRAMA

10. The questions about life

AKA, Christmas overload.

I'm technically an adult, so I'm legally required to live a little, right?

1. Watch an R-rated Scary Movie in a Movie Theater

2. Buy a Lottery Ticket

3. Vote in an Election

4. Participate in a Run (or a Walk, Realistically) for Charity

5. Go on a Road Trip

6. Start a Savings Account

7. Get a Credit Card

8. Sign up for Spotify Premium

9. Go to a Club

10. Start a Meditation Routine

11. Go to a Yoga Class

12. Treat Myself to a Dinner for One

13. Volunteer for a Charity

14. Participate in a Research Study

15. Bake Something (That Ends Up Being Edible)

16. Go Skydiving

17. Be Called for Jury Duty

18. Figure Out What I Want to Do With my Life

The holiday classics that shaped my life

1."But what would happen if we all tried to be like Santa and learned to give as only he can give: of ourselves, our talents, our love and our hearts? Maybe we could all learn Santa's beautiful lesson and maybe there would finally be peace on Earth and good will toward men."

"Sometimes the most real things in the world are the things we can't see."

"If you won't use your heart, who cares if it gets broken? If you just keep it to yourself, maybe it'll be like my rollerblades. When you do decide to try it, it won't be any good. You should take a chance. Got nothing to lose."

"Remember, no man is a failure who has friends."

"Life is made up of meetings and partings. That is the way of it."

"If you look for it, I've got a sneaky feeling you'll find a that love actually is all around."

"Sometimes things look good on paper, but lose their luster when you see how it affects real folks. I guess a healthy bottom line doesn't mean much if to get it, you have to hurt the ones you depend on."

"'Maybe Christmas,' he thought, 'doesn't come from a store. Maybe Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.'"

"Faith is believing when common sense tells you not to."

"There's room for everyone on the nice list."

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1. Why are towels considered dirty when you get out of the shower clean?

2. Who closes the bus door once the bus driver gets off?

3. Why is there a "d" in "fridge" but not in "refrigerator"?

4. If you drop soap on the floor is the floor clean or the soap dirty?

5. Is the "S" or the "C" silent in the word "scent"?

6. Does expecting the unexpected make the unexpected the expected?

7. Would Lightning McQueen buy car insurance or life insurance?

8. Who put the alphabet in alphabetical order?

9. What color are mirrors?

10. If 2 mind readers read each other's minds whose mind are they really reading?

11. Is there a synonym for "synonym"?

12. If your shirt isn't tucked into your pants, are your pants tucked into your shirt?

13. Why is it called "quick sand" if you sink slowly in it?

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