As election day creeps closer and closer, we all need a break from the constant drama of domestic politics. At least, I know I do. However, in keeping with the seasonal theme of politics, I've put together an election time playlist that goes perfectly with your whole "I wish I lived in Canada right now" vibe. So sit back, relax, and let the sweet sounds of alt-rock drown out the deepening sense of panic in your soul. Enjoy!
1. "It's the End of the World as We Know It" by R.E.M.
Ah, yes, it's the quintessential addition to any doomsday playlist. This catchy '80s tune will surely distract you from the eminent disaster we're speeding toward, at least for a little while.
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2. "Ain't No Rest for the Wicked" by Cage the Elephant
Sure enough, these candidates just won't stop, no matter how much we may want them to. Neither age, nor medical diagnoses can keep these two down. This could be due to the rigorous campaign schedule, or it could be that any hint of rest will surely be interpreted as weakness. Either way, Hillary and Donald are in it for the long haul. Sadly.
3. "Bigmouth Strikes Again" by The Smiths
If you've been following along with the wonderful world of American politics, then you'll have no doubts as to whom this is referring to. Donald Trump is seemingly incapable of censoring his speech, which has lead to numerous public scandals. The most notable one being the recent "Hot Mic" bus incident, where Mr. Trump described how he would sexually assault women. Believe me, this old rock tune is much easier to listen to than a misogynistic, hate-filled rant.
4. "Good Ol' Fashion Nightmare" by Matt and Kim
Do you ever think that maybe this entire election season has been part of some extremely elaborate lucid dream? Unfortunately, this is one nightmare that you can't wake up from, no matter how hard you try.
5. "Hell" by Tegan and Sara
Yeah... I think this one speaks for itself.
6. "I Will Buy You a New Life" by Everclear
It's no secret that neither presidential candidate is wanting for money. The difference is that one has spent years building her career as a politician, while the other has centered his entire reputation around the fact that he lives in a lavish state of immense wealth. His legal dealings make it obvious that he handles many problems by simply throwing money at them and hoping for the best. However, allegations of bankruptcy may throw a wrench in his plan to buy the American people a "new life."
7. "I'm Not Over" by Carolina Liar
This one's an shout-out to the current POTUS, President Barack Obama. I'm so sorry I didn't appreciate you fully for the last eight years. I realize now just how much this country needs a leader like you. Please don't go, Sir. "I'm not over you just yet."
8. "Ignorance" by Paramore
Ignorance will always have a place among people who are unqualified for a job to which they are applying. Mr. Trump has spent his entire life in business, and has even garnered support by proudly declaring that he is not a politician. However, sometimes there are jobs that politicians are just best suited for, like President of the United States, for instance. In the interest of saving space, I won't even go into his ignorance of women, race, and sexuality. That could merit an entire book.
9. "Liar (It Takes One to Know One)" by Taking Back Sunday
What? These songs aren't all about Trump? Nope, sorry. While Mr. Trump does tend to lie whenever his mouth is open, I chose this one with Hills in mind. Perhaps the most memorable instance of lying throughout this campaign came when Hillary was caught using a private internet server. While she has owned up to her mistakes, it took a while to get there.
10. "Madness" by Muse
This one mainly refers to the election season as a whole, rather than any one person (no matter how apt that association may be). These past couple of years have sure been one weird and wild ride. However, Muse is here to ease your troubles with some smooth synth tunes.
11. "Megalomaniac" by Incubus
Attempting to obtain the highest office in the US is bound to be accompanied by at least some lust for power. However, Trump seems to be the true embodiment of this. His despotic rhetoric has even gained him support from Vladimir Putin himself. That's some high praise for anyone who dreams of tyranny.
12. "Regret" by New Order
How did we get here? Was this really the best America had to offer? We had so many chances to vote for different candidates, and now it appears that we have squandered them. With decreasing GOP support for Trump, it certainly seems like at least a few high-ranking Republicans regret their decision.
13. "Rich Kid Blues" by The Raconteurs
Don't you just hate it when all you have to get your business started is a small loan of $1 million? So sad. How is anyone able to survive on such scraps as this? Whether or not you sympathize with the plight of a humble millionaire just trying to make a new start in politics, this folksy alt song is perfect for drowning your sorrows.
14. "Rules Don't Stop" by We Are Scientists
Neither candidate in this election is averse to breaking a few laws. From Hillary's email fiasco to Trump's multiple lawsuits, these two obviously have some experience with circumventing the rules, whether through outright lying or by shelling out a few thousand dollars.
15. "The Sound of Settling" by Death Cab for Cutie
While this one may not be written specifically for the election, like the new Death Cab jam, "Million Dollar Loan," it sums up a sentiment that really hits home, especially for millennials like myself. If you're like me, you were probably feeling the Bern pretty strongly. However, after realizing that Hillary is our only hope for avoiding a Trump presidency, we've had no choice but to head for the Hills. Hey, she's better than nothing.
16. "Typical" by Mutemath
As much as I hate to say it, this really is what politics has come to. A lifelong politician legitimately struggling to outpace a pop culture icon. This is the new normal. Besides, although people may think that liking neither candidate is some new phenomenon, this happens every four years. Every time the election rolls around, people become disenchanted by the caliber of politicians we've produced. It's not a new sensation, sadly. It's "typical."
17. "Would You Fight for My Love?" by Jack White
Some people will say or do anything they can to get approval, especially politicians looking for your vote. Although it's certainly true that personal values can be very polarizing when candidates are concerned, that doesn't mean that either is going down without a fight. The past few months have truly shown that these two are willing to do what ever it takes to get the vote.
18. "Promises, Promises" by Incubus
Speaking of doing whatever it takes to get the vote, how about empty promises? Both candidates seem to be full of them. Is Mexico really going to pay for a racist symbol of oppression (aka, the wall)? Is anyone really going to solve the problems with our healthcare system? We can probably guess the answers to both of these questions right now, but that won't stop the candidates from saying otherwise.
19. "You've Got to Hide Your Love Away" by The Beatles
Come on, you didn't really think I'd get through 20 alt-rock songs without a shout-out to the most famous rock band of all time, did you? Here, The Beatles sum up what quite a few voters might be feeling right about now. Namely, the fact that they are afraid to say whom they're voting for. Really, there's no right answer to the question "Who are you voting for?" anyway. You're guaranteed to upset someone either way. The Beatles were definitely on to something here.
20. "You Just Can't Win" by Them
This '60s rock tune perfectly describes how many Americans feel this election season. It seems like many people don't want to vote for Trump or Hillary; yet, they may also feel like voting for a third party candidate is akin to not voting at all. No matter what the outcome, there's only going to be one real winner this year, and it's not the American people.
