To be completely honest, I learned a lot more things than what a typical 19-year-old would. Along the way, I faced a lot of life lessons that have helped become the person I have wanting to be for so long. I am now twenty years old and I am continuing to grow every day as a person. Here are nineteen things I have learned when I was nineteen that could help you:

1. It’s OK to say no. You don’t need to give an explanation or feel guilty.

2. You will love again when the time is right.

3. The past is the past; don’t dwell on it. You are not a bad person for the ways you tried to kill your sadness.

4. Make peace with the people you hurt while you were hurting.

5. You are not worthless. You have a purpose. You are determining your own path.

6. Stop pretending to be fine when you aren’t. It’s OK to admit you are hurting and struggling. There are people who love you and want to help.

7. Don’t get stuck in a rut. Discover new hobbies, go on adventures, and find friends who truly care.

8. Stop trying to just get through life. It’s not something to be gotten through. It’s something to be experienced and learned from. See the good in every part of it.

9. Call your family. Tell them about your day and let them know you love them. They love you more than you will ever know—don’t forget that.

10. Don’t take everything so personally. Most people don’t know how fragile you are. Not everyone feels everything as deeply as you do.

11. Don’t lose yourself. This world is hard and people will try to tear you apart. Don’t let it break you. Your empathy and genuineness are one of a kind.

12. When you’re feeling lonely, learn to sit with it. You are worth so much more than you give yourself credit for.

13. Respect yourself. If you don’t, who will?

14. Speak up. You deserve to be heard. Don’t be afraid to let people know what’s on your mind. Staying quiet won’t accomplish anything for you.

15. Have confidence. Stop focusing on your “imperfections.” You are you, and that is beautiful.

16. Don’t allow others to define you. They will try to convince you that they have you all figured out, but no one knows you the way that you do.

17. When you wake up, think of three things you are grateful for. Starting your day with a positive mindset helps influence how the day plays out.

18. Let go of anything that causes you pain or sadness, whether it’s a person, job, or place. Do what you have to do for you. Screw what anyone else thinks.

19. Never apologize for your feelings. You have every right to feel the way you do.