Newly legal and about to fly from the nest, I'm not completely unarmed in my quest towards the next stage of life. Here's 18 things I'm glad I figured out before turning 18:
1. To do things alone
There’s something about being confident enough in yourself to do things without other people around. To be secure enough to grab breakfast alone, shop for a new dress alone, or go to a new place alone takes a certain amount of strength and independence that I think will really help me out in the long run.
2. To forgive
I’ll admit this one was hard to figure out. While I don't hold grudges for very long or stay mad at someone for more than two hours (max), if I ever encountered a situation in which I was particularly hurt, I would hold it against the other person for ages. But now I know it takes far too much mental energy to hold a grudge, especially when you realize that second chances can surprise you.
3. To not have regrets
Some people say it’s important to have regrets. I disagree, simply because having regrets means doubting myself. Once I’ve made a decision, I need to stick with it, accept the consequences and deal with it. My mentality is: at the end of the day, if I've learnt something, there’s nothing to regret about it.
4. To move on
Not having regrets and moving on almost go hand in hand, because if I can’t move on from something, I can’t get over any sort of regret I may have felt for it.
5. To not be petty
In my (now) eighteen short years, I have met far too many petty people. At one point of time I myself must have been a pretty petty person but I’ve found that I achieved a grand total of nothing by being petty. Being the bigger person honestly takes so little effort, so may as well save myself the trouble.
6. To sleep literally anywhere
Given that I just finished the insanely rigorous IB Diploma Program, this is probably the most important skill I picked up. And I’m sure from what I’ve heard about life at Cal (academic and otherwise), the ability to catch a few Zs just about anywhere will make sure I won’t spontaneously combust under pressure.
7. To set boundaries
Boundaries form one of the most essential parts of every acquaintanceship, friendship, relationship or even rivalry. I’ve seen far too many people get used, trampled on or made uncomfortable solely because of a lack of boundaries placed by them, and I have never wanted to be one of those people.
8. To take credit
If I did the work, I want to make sure my contribution is known. I don’t have an incessant need to be recognized, but in a world where everyone is just looking for opportunity, at least I know I can defend myself and my work.
9. To give credit
That being said, I’d never want to be one of those people who takes credit where it isn’t due. I know that by fair acknowledgement I become a better team player and overall a better person.
10. To work hard
Goes without saying – I can’t reap any rewards if I'm not willing to work for it. Everything I’ve ever wanted, ever achieved, I’ve had to work for and I’m glad I’ve developed a work ethic that keeps me self-motivated.
11. To be organized
I like to be in control, ergo I try to keep things as organized as I can, whether it’s mapping out my route on Google Maps, creating To-Do lists, or attempting to pack for trips weeks in advance. Sometimes this works against my favor, but it keeps me focused and I can’t complain there.
12. To believe in myself
Always and unquestioningly. If I didn’t believe in myself, no one would.
13. To trust my instinct
I’ll be honest, my instincts used to be as accurate as Fox News, but over the years, I’ve gotten better at acting on them. Most of the time, my gut feelings are a good enough, if not perfect, indication of my feelings towards a situation, and while I may not always take appropriate action after (I’m getting there), at least it’s in the right direction.
14. To trust my parents’ instinct
As cliché as it’ll sound, my parents have incredible instincts. Not to say all parents have stellar instincts, but my parents do. I trust them with lots of things because the receipts have shown that they’re good at making decisions, even if that decision is letting me decide for myself.
15. To take a joke
If you ask me, laughter is the way to one’s soul. Life is far too serious to get through it without a good couple of jokes, and I find difficult situations are often best dealt with by means of a joke (good, bad, punny – I have no preference). Even if it’s at my expense, I’ve learned to roll with the punches and take it in good humor.
16. To ask for help
I know for a fact there’s lots of things I haven’t figured out how to do. But I’m not proud enough to think I can figure out everything on my own. I know how to ask for help, and I know it doesn’t make me any less competent of a person for doing so.
17. To believe in karma
What goes around comes around. The circle of life. I don’t necessarily believe in God, but I do believe in karma. This is completely a matter of personal belief, so I have nothing to preach here.
18. To always learn
I’m only eighteen now. Although I’ve already learnt several (what I would consider important) skills and life lessons, I know the journey doesn’t end here. I will learn to make smarter decisions, be more truthful, be kinder and be better. So I’ll keep learning.