As we enter 2018, we can take some time to reflect on all that 2017 taught us. It was a year of lessons, both good and bad, big and small, and I hope to carry these lessons into 2018 so that I can continue to learn from them.
1. Family is more than blood.
I love my blood-related family, but this year my definition of family expanded to include more wonderful people who have entered my life and proven, with incredible amounts of love and lots of resilience, that family is more than DNA.2. Love really is complicated sometimes.
I always thought it was silly when people called their romantic relationships “complicated” but 2017 taught me that when it comes to caring for someone and whether they care for me or not, there’s more factor than just two hearts, and it really can be extremely complicated.3. Selflessness is the key to happiness.
4. Crying is important.
I’m an emotional person, but I don’t cry that much. However, the release of emotions that crying brings is important. This year I cried because my friend has cancer, I helped my roommate cry through bottled up stress, a group of us helped a friend cry and process the loss of her uncle, I saw my professor cry about Holocaust literature, my campus pastor cried as he prayed for refugees, and I learned that sometimes, all we need is a good cry, and that’s okay.
5. It's okay to treat myself.
As a college student with limited money, I often don’t buy myself something unless it’s extremely necessary and practical. However, I have a part-time job that makes sure I have enough money for gas in my car and such, so this year I took a few opportunities to buy myself things I didn’t need, but want. Now I have new clothes that make me feel more confident and I’ve enjoyed new ice cream flavors and I plan to treat myself every now and again in 2018 too.
6. The plan for my life doesn't have to be specific yet.
Some college juniors can already tell you about where they want to go to grad school and exactly how many kids they want in ten years. Meanwhile, I’ve just begun really asking myself what I want for my life, and it doesn’t include specifics yet. Any career will do, as long as I’m happy and I get to love people. Whether I’m married in five years or not doesn’t matter, as long as I’m following God closely. Having a general plan for life is just as valid as having a specific one.
7. I need high standards.
I compromised myself this year as I pursued relationships I wanted. Even though my friends tried to reason with me, I stubbornly pressed towards the goal I wanted. I ended up getting my heart broken, and I learned that I need to set high standards for myself and for the people who say they want me in their life.
8. There is nothing like dancing with friends.
When Taylor Swift’s “Reputation” came out, my friend and I got one of the special magazines from the store that day. We proceeded to bake cookies, read lyrics, and dance for hours, listening to the entire album twice in a row. It’s a simple, joyful memory that I’ll never forget. I plan on dancing more with my friends and by myself in 2018.9. Growing in patience is annoying, but necessary.
I’m an impatient person, but God began working on me in that area in 2017. He made me a nanny for the summer, which required a lot of patience, and He gave me relationships that are still teaching me patience through understanding our differences and obeying God’s timeline. Sometime it’s frustrating, but I know that in the end it will be worth it.10. Reading is beautiful.
In high school, I could read a 600 page book in a day. Now, I’m lucky to finish a 200 page book in less than a week. With a job, homework, and other extracurricular activities, it’s no surprise that I’m busier than high school, but I shouldn’t deny myself the joys of reading. There’s nothing like finishing a good book.
11. We've got to keep talking about difficult subjects.
One of my English classes discussed sex and rape more than any of my other classes combined. My roommates and I discussed our opinions of gay marriage. I had multiple conversations about religious liberty when I participated in World Hijab Day even though I’m a Christian. None of those things were easy- but they are crucial to our understanding of the world and each other as human beings. 2018 will no doubt hold plenty of its own controversies, and we must be ready to speak about them civilly too.
12. I need God.
There has never been a year where I didn’t need God, but He poignantly taught me this year in a new way. As doubt made me feel distant from my Creator, I had to learn how to fight for my faith every day. Every day, I had to immerse myself in Him and His Word and I had to ask Him for forgiveness over and over as I pursued Him and fell, pursued Him and fell. There was faithfulness from Him when I was faithless towards Him. There was grace and mercy and undeserved joy. And I learned anew that I will always need Him.
13. People with Down Syndrome are awesome.
I’d never been friends with someone with Down Syndrome before February 2017, but on December 31 of 2017 I was on the phone with my friend who has Down Syndrome discussing how much I love him and how grateful I am to have him in my life. He has inspired me in countless ways and maybe that’s because he has Down Syndrome and Down’s makes him awesomely different. Maybe he’s just awesome, Down’s or not. Regardless, I got an awesome new friend in 2017 and I’ve learned a lot about a disability that used to intimidate me.
14. All relationships take commitment and hard work.
Whether it’s scheduling time with a co-worker I love but rarely get to see, remembering to call home, being self-accountable for my relationship with the Lord, making sure I actually get to see my crazy busy roommates, or taking the time to text the guy I have a crush on, I learned that all relationships take commitment and hard work. Hoping you run into each other or being nonchalant doesn’t keep you in each other’s life- being intentional does.
15. I need to smile more.
Whether I was just unhappy because I had woken up late or was stressed with three tests in one day on top of a late loan payment, I frowned a lot. I scowled a lot. My brain was so busy worrying, that I had to remind myself to smile a lot. And smiling actually made me feel better, so here’s to smiling more in 2018!
16. I have a lot of personal growth to do.
I’ve learned a lot this year, but I can still see how much growing I have to do. I’m becoming more independent, but there’s a lot I still need to work on. I got a leadership position, but I’m still not the leader I know I can be. I’m writing more, but my writing is not to the level I’d like it to be. And so 2018 is a year of personal growth! There’s no way to go but up, right?
17. I'm ready for 2018!
2017 was a year. Now I’m ready for 2018! It’s been a week and although there’s still a long ways to go before December 31, 2018 and so much could happen before then, I’m ready for this year. I’m excited for this year in a way I haven’t been before. That was one of the last lessons I learned in 2017 and that I’m still learning as this year starts.I hope you learned from 2017 as much as I did. Let’s make 2018 even better!