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16 Undeniable Truths About Christian Concerts

8. Trying to one up people on how many times you've seen Skillet or TobyMac.

Allison Kennedy

May 22, 2017

Anderson, South Carolina

248

16 Undeniable Truths About Christian Concerts

Last night I just got back from an NF concert and I realized there are just some inevitable truths about Christian concerts. As a self-proclaimed Winter Jam Veteran (13 years in a row baby), Passion-goer, and having practically memorized Skillet's entire act (yes, including the things they say in between songs) for their Comatose tour, I thought it would be fun to share some truths about Christian concerts you've probably experienced as well.

1. You see people with Passion or 116 shirts at every turn.

2. You'll definitely run into someone you know.

3. You'll probably need to ask the Lord for forgiveness after remembering all of the people you pushed over for good seats.

4. "I saw them when they were the opening act of Winter Jam."

5. That one youth group who bought matching shirts and takes up an entire section.

6. You'll definitely see Tim Hawkin's different phases of hand raising:

7. Pro ad-libbing.

8. Trying to one up people on how many times you've seen Skillet or TobyMac.

9. Everyone dresses super hipster.

10. "We're going to take a love offering."

11. Testimonies.

12. You don't feel so bad because everyone else in the audience is awful dancers.

13. The faces of people who came for Tenth Avenue North but have to sit through RED or TFK beforehand.

14. Moms on Christian rappers: "I can't understand him when he talks so fast. Are you sure this music is appropriate?"

15. Girls in the audience will swoon over Colton Dixon and Joel and Luke from For King & Country.

16. It's lit and everyone goes crazy for some awesome Jesus music.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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16 Undeniable Truths About Christian Concerts

8. Trying to one up people on how many times you've seen Skillet or TobyMac.

1. You see people with Passion or 116 shirts at every turn.

2. You'll definitely run into someone you know.

3. You'll probably need to ask the Lord for forgiveness after remembering all of the people you pushed over for good seats.

4. "I saw them when they were the opening act of Winter Jam."

5. That one youth group who bought matching shirts and takes up an entire section.

6. You'll definitely see Tim Hawkin's different phases of hand raising:

7. Pro ad-libbing.

8. Trying to one up people on how many times you've seen Skillet or TobyMac.

9. Everyone dresses super hipster.

10. "We're going to take a love offering."

11. Testimonies.

12. You don't feel so bad because everyone else in the audience is awful dancers.

13. The faces of people who came for Tenth Avenue North but have to sit through RED or TFK beforehand.

14. Moms on Christian rappers: "I can't understand him when he talks so fast. Are you sure this music is appropriate?"

15. Girls in the audience will swoon over Colton Dixon and Joel and Luke from For King & Country.

16. It's lit and everyone goes crazy for some awesome Jesus music.

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#Adulting is hard.

1. Taking care of yourself when you're sick

2. Making a to-do list

3. Planning your activities around the weather

4. Scheduling your own doctor’s appointments

5. Getting your own toilet paper

6. Making food without needing to ask your mom questions

7. Holding your tongue

8. Saving your paycheck (or your tax refund) to pay your bills

9. Balancing your checkbook

10. Going places alone

11. Packing your own lunches

12. Actually eating your vegetables...on purpose

13. Taking a multivitamin

14. Planning a life after graduation

Sometimes bigger isn't always better.

1. If something happens, everyone knows about it

2. Never getting to be invisible

3. Knowing every single thing about every single person in the town

4. New kids are a big deal

5. It’s hard to make new friends

6. On that note ... the dating pool is even smaller!

7. Teachers are weirdly close to their students

8. It forced you to make friends out of school

"I'm hopeless and awkward and desperate for love"

1. That Time He Tested Out His Flirting Skills and This Happened

2. When He Was Willing to Do Anything to Avoid Confrontation

3. When He Couldn't Handle Awkward, Emotional Situations

4. How He Reacted Whenever His Friends Ignored Him

5. All of the Times He Worried About His Failing Love Life

6. Whenever He Tried to Whip Himself Into Shape

7. How He Handled New People and New Experiences

8. Whenever His Friends Got Annoying, He Was Always the Voice of Reason

9. He Always Knew How to Jam

10. He Finds a Way to Make Any Situation More Fun

No, I can't help you.

1. When a customer wants to return a product, hands you the receipt, where is printed "ALL SALES ARE FINAL" in all caps.

2. Just because you might be having a bad day, and you're in a crappy mood, doesn't make it okay for you to yell at me or be rude to me. I'm a person with feelings, just like you.

3. People refusing to be put on hold when a customer is standing right in front of you. Oh, how I wish I could just hang up on you!

4. Having the same conversations over and over again! To be honest I really don't even want to talk to you right now, or have this fake ass smile on my face!

5. Always having to have a smile on your face. I promise I'm not as happy as I may look!

6. Customers not understanding that sometimes, mistakes happen. I am a human being, we all mess up sometimes!

7. Having the boss from hell, it's their way or the highway! Even though I did my job correctly and efficiently, if I don't do it the exact way you do, I'm a piece of shit.

8. Having coworker who don't help out, who bend the rules just enough to screw you over.

9. Having to be at work after closing because a customer is taking forever and half! Not like I'd like to go home or anything!

10. Having shitty hours and more shifts than you asked for. Just because we don't have enough workers, doesn't mean I want to pick up every shift that you cant cover, oh great boss of mine!

11. Not having time for a social life. It gets old saying, "I can't I have work..." Every day of the week!

12. Having that lazy costumer who can't do anything for themselves... no please I'll get that, it's no problem at all!

It's just my face, I swear.

1. When you meet new people, they automatically assume you hate them or are rude.

2. People are constantly asking you if you're OK.

3. After being friends with someone for a while, they confess to you, "I thought you were so mean when I first met you," or, "I thought you hated me."

4. You get told to smile more, but they don't understand how scary that would be.

5. You're always labeled as seeming "judgy."

6. Passing a friend with your RBF in full force and not realizing you just shot them a death glare.

7. Being sarcastic, but everyone thinks you're outright rude.

8. Not knowing how mean you really look until you see a picture of yourself in resting face.

9. Your apologies never sound sincere because of your emotionless face.

10. Your "mad face" scares you.

11. And, lastly, people are constantly asking you if you are happy or having a good time because you look bored to death.

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