Being pale isn't a lifestyle choice I'd recommend to anyone. Ask any pale person and they would agree that spending the summer tucked under an umbrella on the beach for fear of becoming lobster is less than glorious. My freshman roommate used to assure me that it was OK that I was so pale because winter was my season to shine. I don't think she understood that blending into the snow is equally as bad as being glaringly pale on a beach. I mean, you get used to it after a while, right? Let me tell you, it never stops surprising me how easily I can get sunburned. In honor of it being late April and me already being sunburned, I've decided to write a list of all the things pale people will understand dealing with.
1. Getting sunburned after only 20 minutes in the sun
2. Having to wear at least SPF 50
3. Being told, "It'll fade to tan," when you know it'll peel back to pale
4. Getting burned no matter how high the SPF and how many times you reapply
5. Not wanting to wear a bathing suit because your stomach is blindingly pale
6. Finally getting a tan and realizing you're just a darker shade of pale
7. Feeling like a "Twilight" vampire when you step out into the sun
8. Not being able to wear summer-y pastels and whites because they make you look even paler
9. Standing out in pictures with your friends as "the ghostly pale one"
10. Cursing your luck to inherit your pale, Irish genes
11. Fearing spray tans and tanning lotions because you don't want to look orange or streaky
12. Being tempted to try some type of tanning lotion anyway when you see how good your friends' tans look
13. Awkward burn lines that remain a different shade of pale than the rest of your body
14. Being able to get a sunburn in 60 degree weather
15. Being able to get a sunburn when it's cloudy
16. Always having sunblock and aloe because you can't afford to be unprepared
17. An absurd number of freckles from being in the sun
18. Old people telling you you'll be happy about your nice pale skin when you're older because it won't wrinkle as soon.
19. Actually checking the strength of the sun on any given day because you know you can sunburn super easily.
20. Looking paler than normal on the beach because you're covered in a thick layer of SPF 50 sunblock
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