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15 Thoughts Every New Jersey Driver Has

"And I'm cutting you off.... NOW!"

Amanda Barba

Mar 26, 2017

Seton Hall University

163

google.com

New Jersey: the land of traffic, the beach, and drivers who don't care about anyone else but themselves. Here's just a few thoughts everyone has while driving in New Jersey!

1) I wonder how other people do it... pumping their own gas...

I have never once touched a gas pump and I never intend to. Ahh, New Jersey.

2) Stay, stay, I did NOT tell you that you could go!

I do this 100% of the time while driving. I always know when someone's getting the bright idea of turning out in front of me and I just think, 'Not today, sweetheart, you can stay right there!'

3) How do you not see me?! I'm BRIGHT. RED.

I say this all the time. Anyone who knows me knows this is my go to scream-phrase. My car is candy apple red.

4) There's a cop up there, which means everyone needs to slow down and stare at the lights!

Always. Always. I get you all want to see what's happening, but it's probably some idiot getting a ticket. Nothing fascinating, now MOVE, some of us have places to be and people to see.

5) Okay, those police lights are seriously blinding though.

They need to do something about this, especially at night. I can just about see the road, let alone if a cop decides to hop in front of my truck.

6) Oh my god, the sun! I'm blind!

No matter the time of day, the sun always manages to be in my eyes while driving, and the visor certainly does not help us short people one bit.

7) And I'm cutting you off.... NOW!

Blinker at the last second? Check. Lunatic beeping behind you? Double check.

8) How do I get there? Google Maps! I wonder what people did before GPS..

My GPS knows how to get me there in one piece, how to reroute me because I always miss my turns. The machine always knows!! I trust the machine.

9) Let me- LET ME IN! No? You get the middle finger AND the horn!!

Hope you're ready, cause I can do this for miles!

10) Oh my god, I love this song! plays it 20 times in a row

The song will not end until I know every single word and everyone else around me does, too!

11) The light is yellow - GO GO GO!

I can make it, I know I can!

12) Wawa or QuickChek, which gas is cheaper today?

Those 5 cents really make a difference. Piece of Advice -- QuickChek is always cheaper.

13) GO FASTER OR MOVE OVER!!

It never fails that you'll be going a cool 45 mph and an old lady turns out going 15... never fails...

14) Run, little squirrel, run!

I will always slow down and let all my little furry friends cross the road.

15) Jeez, you're going so fast! And I'm going fast! How fast are you going?

Everyone in New Jersey drives like a crazy person, and if you're not ready for it, then you just shouldn't be here.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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15 Thoughts Every New Jersey Driver Has

"And I'm cutting you off.... NOW!"

1) I wonder how other people do it... pumping their own gas...

2) Stay, stay, I did NOT tell you that you could go!

3) How do you not see me?! I'm BRIGHT. RED.

4) There's a cop up there, which means everyone needs to slow down and stare at the lights!

5) Okay, those police lights are seriously blinding though.

6) Oh my god, the sun! I'm blind!

7) And I'm cutting you off.... NOW!

8) How do I get there? Google Maps! I wonder what people did before GPS..

9) Let me- LET ME IN! No? You get the middle finger AND the horn!!

10) Oh my god, I love this song! *plays it 20 times in a row*

11) The light is yellow - GO GO GO!

12) Wawa or QuickChek, which gas is cheaper today?

13) GO FASTER OR MOVE OVER!!

14) Run, little squirrel, run!

15) Jeez, you're going so fast! And I'm going fast! How fast are you going?

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Sometimes bigger isn't always better.

1. If something happens, everyone knows about it

2. Never getting to be invisible

3. Knowing every single thing about every single person in the town

4. New kids are a big deal

5. It’s hard to make new friends

6. On that note ... the dating pool is even smaller!

7. Teachers are weirdly close to their students

8. It forced you to make friends out of school

"I'm hopeless and awkward and desperate for love"

1. That Time He Tested Out His Flirting Skills and This Happened

2. When He Was Willing to Do Anything to Avoid Confrontation

3. When He Couldn't Handle Awkward, Emotional Situations

4. How He Reacted Whenever His Friends Ignored Him

5. All of the Times He Worried About His Failing Love Life

6. Whenever He Tried to Whip Himself Into Shape

7. How He Handled New People and New Experiences

8. Whenever His Friends Got Annoying, He Was Always the Voice of Reason

9. He Always Knew How to Jam

10. He Finds a Way to Make Any Situation More Fun

No, I can't help you.

1. When a customer wants to return a product, hands you the receipt, where is printed "ALL SALES ARE FINAL" in all caps.

2. Just because you might be having a bad day, and you're in a crappy mood, doesn't make it okay for you to yell at me or be rude to me. I'm a person with feelings, just like you.

3. People refusing to be put on hold when a customer is standing right in front of you. Oh, how I wish I could just hang up on you!

4. Having the same conversations over and over again! To be honest I really don't even want to talk to you right now, or have this fake ass smile on my face!

5. Always having to have a smile on your face. I promise I'm not as happy as I may look!

6. Customers not understanding that sometimes, mistakes happen. I am a human being, we all mess up sometimes!

7. Having the boss from hell, it's their way or the highway! Even though I did my job correctly and efficiently, if I don't do it the exact way you do, I'm a piece of shit.

8. Having coworker who don't help out, who bend the rules just enough to screw you over.

9. Having to be at work after closing because a customer is taking forever and half! Not like I'd like to go home or anything!

10. Having shitty hours and more shifts than you asked for. Just because we don't have enough workers, doesn't mean I want to pick up every shift that you cant cover, oh great boss of mine!

11. Not having time for a social life. It gets old saying, "I can't I have work..." Every day of the week!

12. Having that lazy costumer who can't do anything for themselves... no please I'll get that, it's no problem at all!

It's just my face, I swear.

1. When you meet new people, they automatically assume you hate them or are rude.

2. People are constantly asking you if you're OK.

3. After being friends with someone for a while, they confess to you, "I thought you were so mean when I first met you," or, "I thought you hated me."

4. You get told to smile more, but they don't understand how scary that would be.

5. You're always labeled as seeming "judgy."

6. Passing a friend with your RBF in full force and not realizing you just shot them a death glare.

7. Being sarcastic, but everyone thinks you're outright rude.

8. Not knowing how mean you really look until you see a picture of yourself in resting face.

9. Your apologies never sound sincere because of your emotionless face.

10. Your "mad face" scares you.

11. And, lastly, people are constantly asking you if you are happy or having a good time because you look bored to death.

Please hold your blonde joke.

1. "Is Elle Woods your spirit animal?"

2. "Is that your natural hair color?"

3. "Oh wow, you get good grades at school?"

4. "You must really like the color pink!"

5. "You’re probably not into sports, right?"

6. "You must have such a bubbly personality."

7. "Your wardrobe must consist of all things preppy."

8. "What sorority are you in?"

9. "You were probably a cheerleader in high school."

10. "You look like you’re from L.A. because your hair is so light."

11. "You definitely like Pumpkin Spiced Lattes from Starbucks!"

12. "Do you actually think blondes have more fun?"

13. "You must encompass the typical “white girl” stereotype."

14. "Is that daddy’s credit card you’re using?"

15. "So all of your friends are blonde too?"

10) Oh my god, I love this song! plays it 20 times in a row

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