Anyone who knows me could easily testify to the fact that I am not a fan of Christmas. In fact, I sort of hate it. While this revelation commonly causes gasps of disbelief, I'm finding that I am actually less alone in this opinion than I thought, and for many of the same reasons as myself. The following is a list of some of the things I hate about Christmas in no particular order:
1. The Fact That It Somehow Starts Before Halloween Now.
There is absolutely no reason for this. There are at least two major holidays still to come and yet for some unknown and probably-not-good-enough reason, Christmas music, decorations, and advertisements have been coming out even before October is over. How are people looking past the fact that they are two whole months early?!
2. Commercialization.
What is probably the culprit for my first objection, the over-commercialization of such an important holiday - whether you celebrate it as the birth of Christ or not - based on love and giving makes me irritated to say the least. Christmas should not be about shopping.
3. "What Do You Want for Christmas?”.
I absolutely hate being asked this question. I never want anything and people don't like being told "I don't know." I'm not being difficult, I'm just content with what I have. I don't need anything else, and if I ever really do need something throughout the year I get it right away because I rarely ask for anything. I also avoid asking others this question, mostly because I know how much I dislike it and don't feel like I should put them in a situation which makes me uncomfortable.
4. Struggling to Find the Perfect Gift for Everyone.
I love giving people I care about presents, and I like for those presents to be perfect. We all know how difficult it can be sometimes to find that gift that is just right for one person you love, but the holiday season puts us in a situation where we are forced to find gifts that are just right for ALL the people we love at the same time. You want it to be some they like and can use, something that makes them happy and demonstrates how much they matter to you, which can make gift-searching pretty stressful.
5. Wrapping Presents.
.
Partially in conjunction with my previous objection, while I love giving gifts, wrapping them is such a hassle. Also, you know that it inevitably is just going to be ripped open and the wrapping thrown away, so its really just a waste of time, energy, and money.
6. Cold Weather.
I realize that Christmas is not necessarily cold for everyone depending on where one lives, but where I'm from this time of year is always cold and often snowy. I really hate when it's cold outside, and I like it even less when it snows - winter is by far my least favorite season, and I cannot ignore its association with this holiday.
7. Having a Decorated Tree in My Living Room.
It throws me off when we have to move the furniture around the room in order to accommodate the slightly-too-skinny plastic tree that my dad has to pull down from the garage rafters and reassemble year after year. Everything gets in the way of moving around the house and it is just uncomfortable. Though we've never had a live tree I definitely wouldn't want one, what with all of the dying needles and the smell of pine that comes from them. And the process of decorating the tree is so long and tedious - almost as long and tedious as is the process of putting it all away.
8. Over-the-Top Lawn Décor.
Some people are made very happy when they see a house all decked-out in ridiculous numbers of lights. I don't get it. I get annoyed when I see homeowners who tried way too hard - it's obnoxious, and it probably costs you way more money in electricity than it's really worth. My grudge against yard decorations could stem from the fact that my mom never let us have much out front when I wanted to as a kid, but regardless of the reason, I can't stand it now.
9. Christmas Movies.
To be fair, I hate all movies in general; however, holiday movies are by far the worst. The "classics" that everybody knows and loves are horrendous and have little to them. They are funny, they aren't cute, they're just dumb. The "heartwarming" messages of Christmas miracles that can be gleaned from many of the holiday favorites are old, dried-up clichés and seeing the same movies running over and over again on television during this season each year gets tiresome fast.
10. Christmas Music.
While I do enjoy some good Trans Siberian Orchestra every now and again, the tacky Christmas jingles that play incessantly on the radio in the car and in stores and everywhere else you go drive me crazy. The majority of them have no merit whatsoever, musically or lyrically, and I believe were only put of the earth to make me miserable. I don't get how anyone can enjoy Christmas songs - I think it must be a large conspiracy against me and that no on actually does.
11. Christmas Dinner.
I'm not big into eating in general - I would never refer to myself as a foodie by any stretch of the imagination - but holiday meals are the worst for me. I have dietary restrictions due to food allergies and I'm a picky eater on top of that, but on holidays I have to eat what everyone else is eating, and what everyone else is eating does not including anything I like. I'm going to be having a baked potatoes for Christmas dinner, and that's probably about it. While most people love holiday meals and leave having eaten far too much, but I leave having eaten even less than I normally do.
12. Santa Clause.
I absolutely hate the idea of some jolly, old, fat man who brings all the kids presents on Christmas. I think it's awful that we all lie to our kids about something so ridiculous, and when you think about it, the story of Santa isn't magical - its terrifying. I mean, some immortal ancient guy with a poor sense of fashion and an intense affinity for little children knows everything you do at all hours of the day, breaks into your house at night, and eats your food. That is super creepy, and I think we seriously need to stop perpetuating and normalizing something so insane.
13. The “Merry Christmas” vs. “Happy Holidays” Controversy.
Why is this such a huge deal? The way I see it, if someone is going out of their way to say something that they intend to be nice to you, you shouldn't get mad because they didn't say it exactly how you wanted them to. Personally, I like Merry Christmas and tend to us that phrasing much more often than Happy Holidays, but I absolutely do not get offended if someone wishes me thee latter. Whichever phrasing is used, the meaning and intentions are generally the same as telling someone to "have a good day," and the fact that people get so caught up in something so relatively trivial is crazy to me.
14. People Who Love Christmas.
Naturally, people who really love something you hate are not fun to be around when they're excited. I can't stand dealing with people who are all full of "holiday cheer" when I just feel like locking myself away until the season is over. Stay away from me with your rosy disposition - you're only going to get complaints from me on this one.
15. Being Called a “Scrooge” or a “Grinch”.
Just because I don't like your favorite holiday does not mean that I am a stingy misanthropist who talks to ghosts or an grumpy, green hermit with a heart two-sizes-too-small. We don't hurl names like "Irontail" (Peter Cottontail's antagonist) at people who dislike Easter or "King George III" (the British king from whom the colonies won their independence during the American Revolution) at people who dislike Independence Day. Besides, name-calling isn't in the spirit of the holiday anyway.
