The 15 Stages of Procrastination | The Odyssey Online
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The 15 Stages of Procrastination

As Told By SpongeBob SquarePants

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The 15 Stages of Procrastination

You know the school year is officially back in full swing when papers and exams are regularly being thrown at us with reckless abandon. You decide that you’re going to be productive this semester, finishing your papers at least two days early with ample time to edit and revise. But, try as you might, there is no escaping the silent killer that is procrastination. When you finally get yourself to the library and sit down to begin what should probably only take you two hours to complete, the panic sets in.

You sit down at your desk in the library and are ready to crush this paper!

But, you should probably check all forms of social media now just to get it out of your system…

Alright, enough of that. You think pensively for the next ten minutes and manage to bang out four or five sentences.


That was a lot of work. You totally deserve a snack.

Okay, that took longer than expected. Back to work!

Hey, maybe you'll call your mom! She’ll know what to do!

Ugh, so rude. You just wanted to talk! Thankfully, your friend just found a group study room. Now you can motivate each other!

Alright, its been half an hour and neither of you have gotten anything done. Maybe some caffeine will help.

Okay, you're both sufficiently caffeinated and ready to get sh*t done.

Your friend finished their work, and now it's just you and the security guard for the rest of the night, until he shuts the lights off on you anyway.

Aaaand he turned off the lights. Time to trudge home and figure out your next move.

You decide you've finished a decent amount of the paper. It's not due until 10 am, anyway. You'll finish the rest in the morning.

You wake up completely delusional, until you remember that you didn't actually finish the paper, and class starts in an hour.

You did it! You finished with 5 minutes to spare! Better run to class...

... Where you realize the assignment isn't actually due until next class period.

Writing essays can be difficult, and your professors know it. Don't pull a SpongeBob. Be sure to leave yourself ample time to organize your thoughts and ideas into a cohesive, well-written paper. You'll thank yourself for it.

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